Healthy lifestyle
A healthy lifestyle is one which helps to keep and improve people's health and well-being.Many governments and non-governmental organizations have made big efforts in healthy lifestyle and health promotion.
Mental Health
Mental health can be considered a very important factor of physical health for the effects it produces on bodily functions. This type of health concerns emotional and cognitive well-being or an absence of mental disorder.
Public health
Public health can be defined in a variety of ways. It can be presented as "the study of the physical, psychosocial and socio-cultural determinants of population health and actions to improve the health of the population.
Reproductive Health
For the UN, reproductive health is a right, like other human rights. This recent concept evokes the good transmission of the genetic heritage from one generation to the next.
Health
Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.
mercredi 6 février 2019
Lupita Nyong'o Treated Herself to a 10-Day Silent Retreat After Black Panther's Success
Lupita Nyong'o covers the March issue of Marie Claire and looks downright jaw-dropping in the accompanying editorial. Clad in floaty looks from Balmain, Givenchy, Gucci, and more, the 35-year-old Oscar winner is the definition of "wearing the clothes, and not letting the clothes wear you."
After celebrating the massive success of Black Panther - which brought in over $1 billion and is the first superhero movie to be nominated for an Academy Award - Lupita is gearing up to terrify us in the upcoming Jordan Peele thriller Us, which hits theaters on March 15. Of working with the Get Out director, Lupita said, "He asked me, 'What is your process as an actor? What do you need from a director?' And I just started to cry. I was like, 'I've never been asked that before.' I could just tell in that question was a man who understood what it meant to be an actor." Read more from Lupita, who also opened up about self-care, her father, and the current political climate, then check out her stunning photo shoot ahead.
- On how she treated herself after the success of Black Panther: "I went on a 10-day silent retreat. It was a gift. I did it for my birthday."
- On what she hopes to provide with her first children's book, Sulwe, which is due out this year: "In no way do I imagine a child will read this and never have a problem with the world discriminating against their skin or themselves discriminating again their skin. But at least you have a foundation. You have something that reminds you that you are enough."
- On the support from her father, Kenyan politician Peter Nyong'o Sr.: "It makes a huge difference to have a father who champions you. My dad was a feminist before it was cool for men to be feminists - his father too in many ways."
- On not becoming passive in our current political climate: "Right now it's a very, very polarizing environment. The pendulum has swung to the nth degree. But it's important that we still find vigor when things are not that extreme because it's in those moments when the pendulum is just swinging side to side that the most damage can be done. That's when you get passive, when things aren't that bad. Before you know it, things are terrible again, because we fell asleep at the wheel."
Even Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper's Screen Test For A Star Is Born Is Fizzing With Sparks
A Star Is Born has finally been released on DVD and digital, and you know what that means: all kinds of fun extra goodies for fans to indulge in. Thanks to a dutiful Instagram fan account called "gagaxbradley," we're now privy to a clip that seems to be a screen test for the close friends and costars, Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper (our Ally and Jackson Maine, respectively). In the screen test, it looks like we're getting an early version of the scene in which Jackson visits Ally's house and begs her to go to his concert that night. Of course, the lack of sound makes it hard to say for certain. It's worth noting that in the clip, Jackson looks way more like Cooper than the messy alcoholic Jackson; he's got a cute denim shirt on, shorter coiffed hair, and . . . is that an earring in his ear?! Let's just say we're glad that got nixed (unless it's hiding underneath Jackson's "mane," ha).
All jokes aside, the screen test shows what we figured must have been there the whole time: an undeniable, totally electric chemistry between Cooper and Gaga. Looks like all that pasta eating and makeup wiping really did ignite a special bond between the two, right from the get-go. While we hope for a longer clip of the screen test (with sound) to appear somewhere, we're just going to keep crying over that "Shallow" performance in Vegas and crossing our fingers for Lady Gaga's big win at the Oscars. Maybe twice over, if we're really lucky.
The Simple Reason Jane the Virgin Decided to Bring Michael Back From the Dead
The cliffhanger ending of Jane the Virgin's fourth season finale really was, just as the show's Latin Lover Narrator likes to say, straight out of a telenovela: Michael, the supposedly deceased husband of star Gina Rodriguez's titular Jane, seemed to be back from the dead - albeit in a more bearded and burly form.
All of this will most certainly be addressed when The CW show returns for its fifth and final season on March 27. But there is a question of whether this storyline is too extreme, even for a show whose very premise is about a virgin who gets pregnant through an accidental artificial insemination (by her Baby Daddy's sister, no less).
Jennie Snyder Urman, the series' creator, told journalists at the show's Television Critics Association press day on Jan. 31 that she was encouraged to go for the shocking twist by Carolina Rivera. An experienced telenovela writer who also works on the show, Rivera said that this was exactly the kind of thing that happens in this genre. Those who pay attention may have noticed that the writers have been building to this storyline for quite some time. Urman said she "knew it was a trope that we were going to save up till the end," but that it was crucial to do it "in a way that is both believable enough and also true to the tone and the spirit of the show."
Still, this isn't the first time the Jane writers have toyed with Michael's fate. In a 2017 episode, Michael "dies" suddenly when he collapses due to undetected side effects from a gunshot wound he sustains earlier in that season. How does all of this impact Brett Dier, who plays the character?
Snyder said after the panel that "he knew it was a telenovela and there was always a possibility, but I also knew that his death had to land and that the show had to exist without him for a certain amount of time."
Also in on the reveal? Rodriguez herself. She said at the panel that Urman told her the twist way before everyone else knew and then swore her to secrecy.
Who Is the Bee on The Masked Singer? After the Super Bowl, Fans Think They Know
After watching the Super Bowl on Sunday, fans of The Masked Singer think they've uncovered a major clue about the identity of whoever has been wearing the Bee costume over the past few weeks: could it be Gladys Knight?!
Admittedly, the "Empress of Soul" has been our guess for who the Bee is pretty much since her first performance on the show, given how much the Bee's voice sounds exactly like Knight's. Not only that, but the clues seemed to be a dead giveaway for Knight, too: the Bee says she's had a "long career" and never wanted to stop doing what she loves; she says the nickname "Empress" suits her; and she wants to sing for "a whole new generation," since she first started singing "in the '50s."
What truly sealed the deal was Knight's soulful performance of the national anthem at the Super Bowl this year, which convinced many fans of The Masked Singer - even those who previously thought the Bee might be Tina Turner - that Knight is indeed behind the wacky black and yellow costume. But, since we're still waiting to see who it will truly be, feel free to compare one of the Bee's most recent performances on the reality competition show with Knight's rendition of the national anthem ahead.
Insecure's Amanda Seales Reveals How She's Most Like Her Character, Tiffany
When Amanda Seales was first cast as Tiffany on HBO's Insecure, she didn't really relate to the character, who seemed "bougie and vapid." But after spending two seasons with Tiffany, the comedian and actor feels very differently. "We've gotten to see more of her softer side," Seales said. "She's not trying to be nitpicky or judgmental. She really is just calling out the truth to her friends, who really make a concerted effort to ignore the truth and the facts. That's an important role to play in a friend circle." Seales admits that she's actually that friend in her social circle. "People don't tell me nothing until they're ready for the truth," she said.
"I didn't shade you. The facts shaded you."
In addition to her role as truth-teller, Seales wears many other hats: DJ, singer, comedian, actress, and game show host. She also holds a master's degree in African-American studies from Columbia University. We spoke to Seales at POPSUGAR Play/Ground - where she interviewed Tiffany Haddish on stage - about what's next for her and for her character.
As one-half of Insecure's most stable couple, Seales said she hopes that Tiffany and Derek (Wade Allain-Marcus) are in it for the long haul, and that the rumors that Tiffany is cheating on Derek aren't true. "Issa wanted to have a couple on the show that actually is working, that actually is functional," Seales said. "I think that it's important to see a functional couple on television, especially a functional black couple. We'll see in season three what happens, but when I heard those rumors, I was like, 'I hope that's not the case.'"
While many people know Seales from Insecure, she's also the creator and host of a live black-culture game show, aptly named Smart Funny & Black, which brings together all of her talents. "I get to sing, host, use my master's in African-American studies, and do comedy all in one space. This is the realization of a dream."
In August, she took the show on the road with a 10-city Smart Funny & Black tour. "You don't have to be black to come to the show, that's not what it's about," Seales said. "It's about understanding and celebrating black culture and what we've contributed to this world."
For Seales, it's all about truth, knowledge, and comedy, and as far as she's concerned, the three can coexist. Does she ever worry about being misunderstood? "I don't," she said, plain and simple. "You may not like how I'm saying something, but you know what the f*ck I'm saying," she said. "I don't speak no sh*t unless I know. Free speech doesn't mean freedom to talk out your ass without being checked. And I don't talk out my ass. I know what I'm talking about it. I didn't shade you. The facts shaded you."
30+ Last-Minutes Presents to Buy Your SO This Valentine's Day - All From Amazon
Shopping for Valentine's Day can be stressful, but this year it doesn't have to be. To make finding the perfect gift easy you can turn to Amazon because the site carries just about everything you could ever think of, including sweet and thoughtful presents. We did the hard work for you and uncovered 32 choices that will surely make them feel special. From a dozen roses to a giant teddy bear, these presents will be delivered right to your door (or theirs!). Take a look.
Someone Photoshopped Nicolas Cage's Face on Ross From Friends, and You CAN'T Unsee This
Today is the day that you begin the impossible task of distinguishing Ross Geller from Nicolas Cage. Some evil genius decided to photoshop Cage's face onto David Schwimmer's in a Friends scene, BuzzFeed pointed out after discovering a Reddit thread from spaghetticondom. The result? A Ross Geller that looks exactly like Ross Geller but is actually Nicolas Cage. I hate to break it to you, but they're essentially the same person.
The deed was actually done by YouTube user derpfakes, who has superimposed Cage's face on a bunch of famous characters before - a wild ride of deepfakes worth exploring at a later time. The particular Friends scene is from season four, episode seven ("The One Where Chandler Crosses a Line"), when Ross plays his music for the gang. The YouTuber swapped everyone's faces with Cage's, but the Ross swap is the only one that's causing a meltdown. Watch the video ahead, and prepare to be genuinely perplexed. Looks like a beer thief in the UK isn't the only person with a striking resemblance to Schwimmer.
Kate Brought an "Object That Makes Her Happy" to a Visit With Children, and It's So Sweet
It's another day, another royal engagement for Kate Middleton. On Feb. 5, the Duchess of Cambridge visited two schools to find out how the charity Place2Be's Children's Mental Health Week is providing "support and training for emotional well-being." This year, the charity's theme is "Health: Inside and Out," so Kate took her time to meet children from Lavender Primary School to find out how the work is helping them (and watch them jogging) before moving on to visit Alperton Community School. She received an adorable musical welcome from Lavender Primary School as the children sang and held up posters that explained how "singing helps all the bad stuff go out and all the good stuff go in." There were plenty of other cute moments, particularly when Kate was asked to show the children an object that makes her feel happy, and she presented a photo of her family.
Kate has a long history with the charity Place2Be. She was involved with the organization before she became an official member of the royal family, and it's a charity she is strongly passionate about. Ahead, get a closer look at her latest visit in support of the charity, then get details on her outfit.
Starburst Duos Are Finally Here, and Our Taste Buds Are Tingling With Anticipation
When Starburst released an all-pink bag of its fruit chews back in 2017, we thought we'd reached the peak of candy heaven. Little did we know, the brand's candy-making wizards were busily concocting an even better treat torn straight out of our wildest dreams: Starburst Duos. These colorful fruit chews, which finally launched this month, combine two flavors into one square-shaped candy, making for quite the mouthwatering explosion. There are two different flavor combinations - Blue Raspberry Lemonade and Strawberry Watermelon - which sound equally tempting.
Starburst Duos are now available in both 2-ounce single packs and 14-ounce lay-down bags for $1 and $3, respectively. Cue up "The Best of Both Worlds" by Hannah Montana, and make your way to the nearest convenience store to try out these colorful candies before other sweet-toothed foodies snatch up the whole stock.
These Wines Will Never Let You Down - Even If You're on a Budget
No matter if your wine preference is red, white, sparkling, or rosé, there is always one type of wine that is everyone's favorite - one that is flavorful and affordable.
However, it's not always easy to find a blend that checks all of your boxes when it comes to bargain bottles, and we are pretty sure there is absolutely nothing worse than popping a bottle of vino only to find out that the one you brought home with the last few dollars of your paycheck is pretty much the worst.
To save you from that moment, we scoped out some of the best bargain bottles on the market today. We asked experts from the wine industry, including sommeliers and wine store owners, and scanned apps like Vivino for wines that have complexity on the palate and flexibility in the pocketbook (or wallet!). Check out this list of bottles that are budget-friendly, but sip like they cost a pretty penny.
30+ Last-Minutes Presents to Buy Your SO This Valentine's Day - All From Amazon
Shopping for Valentine's Day can be stressful, but this year it doesn't have to be. To make finding the perfect gift easy you can turn to Amazon because the site carries just about everything you could ever think of, including sweet and thoughtful presents. We did the hard work for you and uncovered 32 choices that will surely make them feel special. From a dozen roses to a giant teddy bear, these presents will be delivered right to your door (or theirs!). Take a look.
18 Motivating Instagram Accounts Every Black Woman Should Have on Her Timeline
The world can be incredibly draining, and the beauty of social media is that, while it can serve as a source of constant information, it can also be the key to your reprieve. Sometimes you just need a bit of wisdom to help you get over a painful day, or a bit of laughter to remind you that not everything in the world is gloom and doom. And when you're a black woman, you may want to find those sources of light and laughter from people who understand your struggles on a deeper level. The next time you're seeking solace, a word of encouragement, or just the reminder that black women continue to keep crushing the game, be sure to check out any of these 18 uplifting accounts!
21 Home Decor Items From Amazon Selling Faster Than We Can Type - Starting at Just $20
If you're looking for a simple way to refresh your home, try investing in fresh decor pieces that will make it feel like new. From stylish rugs to cozy pillows, we shopped and uncovered 21 affordable finds from Amazon that will blow you away. The best part? These pieces will be delivered right to your door, so you can skip stressful in-store searching. Keep scrolling to shop our favorite picks.
Roses Are Pretty, but an Entire Bouquet of Oreos Is DeLICIOUS
You really can't put a price on love, but if I had to, I'd say it's around $72, which just so happens to be the price of my dream Valentine's Day gift. Every once in a while, an over-the-top gift catches my eye, and it may go without saying, but it's even better when it's edible. When Walmart debuted its Reese's bouquet for Valentine's Day last month, I was into it, but after seeing the store's latest sweet bouquet, I took out my credit card and started celebrating the day of love a bit earlier than planned.
Oreo-lovers, prepare to lose your minds over the All Oreo Lovers Cookie Bouquet ($72) from Walmart. This bundle of deliciousness features 19 large packs of Oreos and festive bows. Sure, I'll always love flowers for Valentine's Day, but can roses really be considered a "gift" if you have to take care of them? Well, I'll be "taking care of" this Oreo monstrosity one pack of cookies at a time.
Costco Is Selling a 5-Tier Wedding "Cake" Made of Cheese Wheels, So Consider Me Engaged
The next wedding on my radar isn't until November, but I'm really hoping I receive another invitation soon and that this five-tier literal cheese cake is on the menu. This thing of beauty from Costco is called the Sid Wainer & Son Cheese Lover Artisan Wedding Cake ($440), and it will make you forget any combination of vanilla cake and buttercream frosting ever existed.
You can actually order this "cake" online from Costco, and it ships within two to three days; yes, shipping is included in that steep price tag. The gourmet cheeses include a Red Leicester (similar to an English cheddar), a Danish Blue (subtle and tangy), and a Murcia al Vino (a "drunken goat cheese"), all from Sid Wainer & Son, which has quite the impressive cheese selection. All in all, it's 24 freaking pounds of cheese, and it serves between 105 and 150 people.
To transform the cheese wheels into a wedding-worthy treat, you just stack them with the largest wheel on the bottom, and go to town with the decorations of your choice. Flowers, ribbons, and other wedding decor accessories are not included. Better yet, why bother waiting for a wedding? Invite yourself (and and everyone you care about) to a cheese-and-wine party of your own.
Kid Says Dad Doesn’t "Want Another Living Thing," but I’ll Be Damned If They Don’t Succeed in Getting a Guinea Pig
A very goal-oriented fifth grader is doing the absolute most to make sure their dad really knows just how much they want a pet guinea pig. For a class assignment entitled "I Am . . . ," the elementary student managed to make every single one of the 15 prompts - which were open-ended and meant to be about anything having to do with the child - about guinea pigs.
"I wonder if my dad will let me get a guinea pig," reads the first prompt. A few others that follow read: "I hear Dad saying, 'I don't want another living thing,'" "I see Dad shaking his head," "I feel sad that I don't have a guinea pig," and, one of my personal favorites, "I understand why Dad says no, but I really want a guinea pig."
Listen, it's clear that this kid's dad does not want to add a guinea pig to their family, but I'll be damned if this assignment doesn't inspire some kind of compromise. We're wishing this fifth grader all of the luck in their endeavors - guinea pig-related and otherwise.
Proof You Should Never Go Out to Eat on Valentine's Day (and What to Do Instead)
Scoring a reservation at a buzzy new spot or one of your favorite restaurants may seem like a major Valentine's Day coup, but proceed with caution. Here's a piece of insider knowledge that those in the restaurant industry might hesitate to tell you: Valentine's Day is the worst possible night of the year to dine out. Having dined out on this holiday, I've firsthand witnessed these pitfalls.
The fundamental reason: you won't get a true taste for what the restaurant has to offer. With a high demand for reservations, many restaurants choose to serve a prix-fixe menu in lieu of the establishment's greatest hits. Not because it makes for a better meal, but because a prix-fixe menu reduces cost and complication. The problem: it can be unfamiliar to both the cooks and wait staff, inviting more opportunity for mistakes both in the kitchen and in terms of wine pairings and menu choices.
Contributing to the chaos, tables get shuffled around and squeezed in to accommodate an increased head count. You might end up in a subpar location (near the dishwasher) or seated at a wobbly, rented table, as has happened to me. More significantly, the arrangement alters the flow of service. An increased number of tables means more orders for waiters to manage, which spells trouble even for veteran teams. Add these factors to the pressure of making this night memorable for the moony-eyed couples, and blunders are bound to happen.
I find it much more romantic to stay in and instead treat my boyfriend and myself to a bottle of Champagne (or Barolo) and a simple but special cheese and charcuterie plate, something hands-off that keeps the cleanup to a minimum. (A mountain of dirty dishes can be quite the mood killer.) Typically, we make a Valentine's Day dinner out of baguette, our favorite cheeses, charcuterie, and luxe accoutrements, like membrillo, cornichons, and marcona almonds. Pair with a couple glasses of wine and a sweet treat sourced from a favorite bakery or a choice assortment of chocolates, and you have the makings of an ideal meal to linger over.
Ultimately, the decision to dine out or stay in is up to you and what feels right to where you are in your relationship, but I wholeheartedly suggest choosing an intimate evening in and instead booking a prime reservation on a less-loaded night.
14 Velvet Furniture Pieces That Look Like a Million Bucks, but We Found Them on Amazon
Sprucing up your space doesn't always mean you need a full remodel. This year, try transforming any room by adding luxe velvet furniture pieces that will make your home look like a million bucks. These pretty pieces don't always come cheap though, so to make sure you get the best deal we shopped and found 14 hot picks from Amazon. From sofas to bed frames, prepare to want them all. Take a look at our favorites ahead.
After an Adorable Cat Scratched at Their Window During the Polar Vortex, This Couple Took Her All the Way In
During the last week of January, much of the US's Midwest and Northeast experienced below-freezing temperatures and bouts of intense snowstorms, called snow squalls. During one such snow squall in Brooklyn, a stray cat started scratching on Nathaniel Styer's apartment window, wanting to come in - and I mean, fair . . . it was freaking freezing. Nathaniel says he recognized the cat as Chunk Chunk, the mother of a litter of kittens he brought in during 2018's polar vortex along with his fiancée, Renee Becerra.
"She disappeared for awhile, but showed back up with a tipped ear - meaning someone trapped her, had her spayed, and released her back to the community. She's always been more friendly than the other members of this cat colony (there are about seven that hang around us)," Nathaniel told POPSUGAR. "I was working from home, and when the 'snow squall' in NYC showed up, she got caught in the storm on our windowsill and clearly panicked."
Although Nathaniel was the one in the right place at the right time for Chunk Chunk, he says Renee is the "true mother of cats in the relationship." He said, "Renee maintains the cat colony (building shelters and feeding them), and I love her - I knew she would want me to help out Chunk Chunk."
Nathaniel set Chunk Chunk up in the bathroom during the storm so that she was away from their dog, Hugo. Now, a week later, the couple is taking her to the vet and is hoping that she and Hugo can get along well - they want their home to be Chunk Chunk's forever home!
Ahead, see a few adorable photos of Chunk Chunk that Renee and Nathaniel have taken since taking her in. (And if you're looking to help strays yourself, Nathaniel says: "We've helped out two different litters of kittens that were born on our property. A huge shout-out to the New York ASPCA for helping find them homes. If people would like to donate - they can find them here.")
People Are Giving Nancy Pelosi a Standing Ovation For Her State of the Union Clapping
It's only February, but perhaps you're already in need of a new 2019 mood. Please, allow me to introduce Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi's State of the Union clapping, for your clever and sarcastic usage. During President Donald Trump's controversial address on Feb. 5, he encouraged politicians to abandon revenge politics. Pelosi stood to applauded loudly in Trump's direction, possibly sending a message of her own. The internet quickly took notice and turned her standing ovation into the meme we all desperately need, when words aren't enough.
After the longest government shut-down in US history, a public back-and-forth over the State of the Union, and a series of offensive tweets, it's no surprise Pelosi's clapping for Trump was a bit incredulous. People began tweeting their own reactions to Pelosi's pointed applause, turning this brief blip into a viral-sensation. Watch the moment as it occurred above, and then keep reading to see people give their own ovation to Madam Speaker.
We Out Here: An Open Letter From POPSUGAR Editors
It is both a thrilling and frightening time to be a black woman. While we're running for office, smashing box office records, writing Great American Novels, and shaping the culture, we are also navigating a world in which we're still being undervalued, underpaid, and underappreciated. In the midst of that, though, is community - black women coming together on the internet and IRL to hold space and fix one another's crowns. Whether we're hyping one another up on the 'gram or taking it offline for a few intentional breaths, one thing is clear: if no one else has us, we'll always have each other.
With that in mind, POPSUGAR is celebrating the breadth and diversity of black women by creating a space for you - and us - to be seen. We Out Here is a place where you will discover everything from the best black-hosted podcasts to accompany your morning commute to beauty brands that give back and how to find a therapist who has your best interest at heart and manage your mental health (because that's super important, too). We recognize the triumphs and the heartbreaks because, for better or worse, we win and lose together. Not only are we out here, but we're not going anywhere, either.
With love,
Tembe Denton-Hurst, Britt Stephens, Meki Pierre, Brea Cubit, Danielle Jackson, Tamara Pridgett, and Maya Berry
Attention, Singles: Get Ready to Swipe Right on the Most Popular Dating Day of the Year
That's right, all you singles out there, Jan. 6 has been declared "Dating Sunday," so it's time to get out your OpenTable app, get some flowers (or chocolates, if you ask me), and show someone some love. Hinge is predicting that Jan. 6 will be the biggest day in dating history, according to various surveys it has conducted for the past two years.
The Numbers Are In
After looking over activity data from the past two years on the Sunday right after New Year's Day, Hinge found that there was a spike in conversations. Listen up. In 2017, 41 percent more people began conversations on the app on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before. The pattern continued. In 2018, 59 percent more people started conversations on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before.
It appears this surge in new conversations (recorded as being based on phone numbers exchanged) is steadily rising, so 2019 will likely follow suit. The same goes for planned activities and meetups. There was also an increase in dates being set up (based on phone numbers exchanged) for those two years. In 2017, 36 percent more people set up dates on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before. In 2018, 62 percent more people set up dates on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before.
Well, as the numbers don't lie, it appears that that Sunday is the busiest day of the week for dating. According to Hinge's data, there was a 36 percent higher response to messages and 20 percent more conversations among users. Additionally, Hinge found that on "Dating Sunday" in 2017, the app saw a 16 percent increase in daily user activity, and in 2018, that number shot up to 23 percent. The app expects to see an even greater increase in the number of new Hinge profiles, conversations, and planned dates on Jan. 6, as singles are looking to meet someone fun and special for 2019. And as for couples, take advantage of the day and do something new and exciting together!
If you need some dating ideas, try something wintry, like ice skating or skiing, if accessible. You can also check out a cool new bar or a cozy speakeasy that's a bit more intimate. If there's some bubbly and a fireplace, even better. If you live somewhere warmer, go for a walk, bike around the city, or grab drinks outside on a patio. You can even try a fitness date, as January is a great month to work on those fitness and wellness resolutions. Pick something fun and seize the day!
If These 22 Things Described Your Relationship, You Should Be HAPPY You Broke Up
Nobody ever jumps for joy after going through a breakup - we're not going to pretend that you should in any way be celebrating the end of your relationship with Champagne and toasts. Even when everyone around you says that you made the right choice, it can still be hard to let go. I'm speaking from legitimate experience when I say that I get it. When you're still reeling from the breakup, and after you put so much into the relationship, it's easy to begin to question why you're letting it go and moving on. These are the 22 signs that you did in fact make the right choice to end things - read 'em and rest a little bit easier, then start making moves to move on!
- You always feared that they would leave you.
- You had more admiration for other couples than you did yourself and your SO.
- When you think back on what the relationship was like, the bad memories come up first.
- Jealousy was a major dynamic between the two of you.
- They made you feel bad for the things you're interested in.
- You didn't feel like they supported your career goals.
- You lost friends because of the relationship.
- There was a constant struggle for superiority; the two of you were never equals.
- Either of you would divulge that they missed the "old version" of the other.
- You didn't feel comfortable around their family, or vice versa.
- You felt like you had to hide an aspect of who you are to maintain their approval.
- Either of you had to vie for affection.
- You or they were constantly worried about what the other was doing when you were apart.
- Even small conflicts turned into tumultuous arguments.
- There were double standards - things that one of you could do that the other couldn't.
- Either of you were continually threatening to end the relationship.
- The relationship more often felt draining than it did uplifting.
- Your friends and family think the two of you are better off apart.
- You depended more on others for emotional support than you did your significant other.
- You often found yourself lashing out at your partner, sometimes without really knowing why.
- Your lives never fully (or easily) melded together.
- You were more often worried about your future together than you were excited for it.
4 Things I Wish People Would Stop Saying to Single Women
I don't talk much about my personal life, especially on the internet. Why? Partly because I tend to be a pretty private person, but also because I'm a single woman in my 20s. Mentioning my singledom, whether to friends and family or in passing online inevitably leads to a slew of uninvited comments. It definitely doesn't help that I'm hitting that age where the people I used to eat lunch and talk about philosophy homework with are getting married and having children and posting it all over social media. And as genuinely nice as it is to have people asking about my life because they care about me, it's also a little much sometimes - and my other single friends seem to run into a lot of the same things. So what are some of the most common things I hear? Here we go.
1. "Let me set you up with my (friend/coworker/brother's roommate's cousin)"
While I appreciate the thought, I really wish people would stop immediately trying to play matchmaker. While blind dates might work for Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, more often than not, they're awkward and forced and the parties don't actually turn out to have as much in common as the matchmaker thinks. Offers like these put me in an awkward spot: How do I gracefully decline without hurting your feelings or indirectly insulting your friend? If we're actually close enough friends that I would go to you for dating advice, I promise I'll ask you directly if I think that guy from your cooking class's group Insta photo is cute. Otherwise, please let it be.
2. "You must not be trying hard enough."
GIRL. Believe me, I have tried. I really have a hard time when people say this because it implies that dating is something like riding a bike or learning to speak French; an objective thing that can be "achieved" through sheer willpower and effort. But since you're dealing with complex things like emotions and other human beings with emotions and free will, dating is not anything like that. Some of the single people I know have tried endless dating apps and hobby groups and all the "right" things and are still single, while some of the happiest couples I know met with almost no effort whatsoever, like something out of a movie. You can't "try" to fall for someone or "try" to have a connection, either.
The corollary to this: I genuinely think people who say things like this don't realize how much pressure it can put on the single person they're talking to. For me, at least, I can get pretty up in my own head when it comes to dating, and it can be hard sometimes to remind myself that my single status is not a "failure" on my part, but a simple fact of circumstance. But when people say things like this, it puts me right back in that mindset - and that's not conducive to trying to date either.
3. "You're single? But you're so (fill in positive adjective)!"
Uh, thanks, I guess? I never know what to say with this one. It's like a weird backhanded compliment. But, surprise! Singledom is not the domain of the "flawed"; being single does not mean something is wrong with someone. Being attractive / smart / good at talking / whatever is not the only thing that's important in dating. I know you think it's a compliment, but from the other side of it, it doesn't really feel like one. Plus, it's super awkward to try to figure out a response to that. I can't say "thank you" because it's not really a compliment, but I feel like I should because it sort of is one. It's just uncomfortable. Honestly, I'd rather talk about something related to whatever that trait is - that way, I know you see me as a whole person, not just with the big label "SINGLE" above all else.
4. Anything about how unhappy I must be, aka variations on "Don't worry!"
OK, I'll admit it: sometimes I do worry about dying alone. I'm pretty sure everyone who feels romantic attraction worries, at some point, about never meeting the love of their life. But here's the thing: that doesn't mean life doesn't start until then. I'm passionate about my career and have a master's degree to prove it. I love my friends and family. I have hobbies I enjoy. Pop culture so often portrays romance as the "missing puzzle piece" or something like that, but I don't think of it like that. It's more like moving into a different sized apartment: there's nothing inherently wrong with a small one, life just expands in interesting ways.
The truth is, sometimes I'm unhappy about being single. The truth also is, sometimes I'm perfectly happy being single. There are even times when I'm unhappy and it has absolutely nothing to do with my relationship status. It's not a one-size-fits-all thing, and it's certainly not a small-talk topic of conversation. I get it: the people who say something along these lines really do care about me; they say it because they don't want me to be unhappy. Assuming I'm unhappy single, though, makes me feel like the other things I do aren't of value or aren't enough to make a person happy.
What all of this really boils down to is this: please stop making assumptions about me just because I'm single. A relationship is certainly something I want, but it's still super uncomfortable when everyone tries to give me unasked-for advice, and it puts me in an awkward spot because I know the questions and advice do come from a place of caring. But when it comes down to it, I'm so much more than my relationship status, and in most cases, I'd much rather talk about something related to my work or my hobbies or my friends. And someday when it's time to introduce a wonderful guy, I'll feel a lot better if I can feel comfortable knowing the first words out of my loved ones' mouths won't be "Oh, FINALLY!"
Why I'm So Glad That I Got Dumped on Valentine's Day
On Valentine's Day, it's common to expect a dozen roses, a box filled with gooey chocolate, or a night out at a swanky restaurant, where you can load up on your favorite bubbly and fine dining cuisine. What you might not expect to happen is having the person you're deeply in love with look you in the eye and break up with you on what is known as the most love-filled day of the year. It happened to me.
The first boyfriend I ever had broke up with me on the second Valentine's Day we ever spent together. He came over that morning, with flowers I could tell he picked up last-minute at the grocery store. They were sad-looking and the petals were wilting, much like the expression on his face when he walked in the door. He sat down and I stood because I could tell something was wrong, and when something is wrong, I like to stand. It helps me process my emotions better, as it allows the energy to flow through my body, rather than come right out of my eyes and nose in the form of tears and snot.
Within five minutes, we went from being madly in love to taking the first step toward becoming distant strangers. He told me he didn't love me anymore. He told me there was someone else. He told me he wanted to wait to break up until after Valentine's Day, but he figured in the end, it was just a day, so why not just get it over with.
I got the whole "sad ending of a love story" scene over with too. I asked him to leave. I asked him to leave the flowers. They were orange and yellow and I liked the way they slumped over.
It was terrible at the time, but surprisingly, that feeling didn't last. Months after the moment happened, it became something I laughed about when out with friends and something that taught me more lessons than any other love situation I had ever been in taught me before. These are three lessons I learned after getting dumped on Valentine's Day.
It Changed the Way I Looked at the 14th of February
Getting broken up with on Valentine's Day didn't make me roll my eyes at the holiday. It made me appreciate it even more. It's a day that shouldn't be spent with just one person. If you have a lot of people in your life you love and adore, make plans to be with them during the holiday too. I used to think it was just a day for romance with the person you were dating, but really it's more for celebration, even if that means you ditch the candlelit dinner for a night at home with a crew of the people who love you all year long.
It Made Me More Aware of Red Flags
When my relationship ended abruptly on Valentine's Day a few years ago, I was at first really surprised. But then I started opening my eyes to all the things that were wrong, all the red flags that I ignored. My boyfriend at the time didn't want to ever be around my friends, he was very protective of me touching his phone or using it, and he would cancel plans a lot without giving me any reason. I had funny feelings along the way, but I kept them buried because I didn't want the relationship to end. Getting broken up with on a day like Valentine's Day made me realize that I don't deserve to just go with the flow in a relationship. If I feel like something is wrong, I have to have the courage to acknowledge it.
It Taught Me a Lesson in Self-Love
One of the biggest and best lessons I learned from getting dumped on V-Day is that on the 14th of February, no matter who you are with or what you are planning to do that day, you should do something for yourself. Take yourself out for a spa treatment, go eat your favorite lunch, take your favorite workout class, or treat yourself to an afternoon shopping. Whatever your idea of self-love is, make sure you dive into it on the day of love this year, and every year, no matter what.
15 Alternative Valentine's Day Date Ideas Way More Romantic Than Going Out to Eat
In case you were wondering and have not heard the subtle whispering in your ear from your significant other or seen the obnoxiously large plush teddy bears in your local grocery store, Valentine's Day is right around the corner. You need to get a move on planning something romantic ASAP. Like most romantic holidays, Valentine's Day can feel repetitive year after year, and people begin to dread planning anything at all. As one of the most heavily overrated holidays after New Year's Eve, it's easy to feel disenchanted with the underwhelming chocolates, long-stem rose bouquets, and stuffy restaurants that have become overly predictable.
Fear not, we're got you covered with date ideas to impress your partner - they're better than an overpriced dinner reservation. After all, what's romance without a little surprise, adventure, and mystery? Try out these 15 alternative Valentine's Day dates that are far from cliché. These ideas will provide infinite opportunities for you and your beau to celebrate love your way. Because seriously, whoever invented those chocolates with the gross cherry liquor in the center clearly knew nothing.
5 Things to Know About Stacey Abrams, the Political Dynamo Responding to Trump's SOTU
In a break with tradition, former Georgia gubernatorial candidate Stacey Abrams will give the Democratic response to President Trump's State of the Union address on Feb. 5.
Typically, the opposition party chooses a well-known figure in Congress or a sitting governor to respond to the sitting president's address. This year, Democratic leaders bucked tradition in selecting Abrams. Abrams lost the 2018 election to Republican Brian Kemp by a margin of 54,700 votes - the narrowest race in years - amid widespread allegations of voter suppression, particularly in communities of color. If Abrams won the election, she not only would have become the first black woman elected governor in the United States, but the first woman to ever hold the office in Georgia.
Tonight, Abrams will return to the political stage: this time, the national one. Selecting Abrams signals that the Democratic Party is publicly backing young progressive leaders ahead of the 2020 elections.
Here are five things to know about Abrams ahead of tonight's rebuttal:
1. She Was an Accidental High-School Politician
Abrams was born in Wisconsin and grew up with five siblings in Mississippi. When she was a teen, her parents relocated the family to Atlanta in the pursuit of higher education - they both aimed to become Methodist ministers. There, Abrams attended Avondale High School. "I was away on a trip, and while I was gone, I got elected to a [student board]," Abrams told Essence. "They put my name in and that was my first election. It was a great way to win an election, not to have to run, not to even have to put my name in." If that wasn't proof of her success streak, she went on to become the valedictorian of her graduating class.
2. She Isn't Afraid to Talk About Student Debt - Including Her Own
Abrams pursued various avenues of higher education, getting her undergraduate degree from Spelman College, a master's degree from the University of Texas's LBJ School of Public Affairs, and a law degree from Yale Law School. While she has dedicated much of her career to getting people out to vote (she founded the nonpartisan New Georgia Project in 2014, an effort to register voters of color), she has a strikingly candid take on student debt.
"I am in debt, but I am not alone," she wrote for Fortune of her near $200,000 in debt from school loans and personal debts. "We all still make money mistakes - but they don't have to be fatal to our dreams."
3. She's a Successful Romance Novelist
Perhaps most surprising is that Abrams has a side gig as a writer of "romantic suspense" novels. Abrams writes under the pen name Selena Montgomery (a move intended to keep her fiction writing separate for tax reasons) and has sold over 100,000 copies of her books. Her writing is published through major publishing house Harper Collins and, naturally, she's also written a biography under her real name about her work as an outsider hoping to change politics.
4. She Won All-Star Endorsements During Her Race For Governor
Abrams's list of endorsements during her race for governor was remarkably flashy and far-reaching. While her support in the state included civil rights icon Congressman John Lewis, she also received support from politicians like Sen. Kamala Harris, Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand, and Sen. Cory Booker - all of whom are running for president in 2020 - along with national organizations like Planned Parenthood, MoveOn, and EMILY's List.
5. She's Already Made Political History
Abrams has already made history in her work in politics: she was the Georgia House Minority Leader and, in 2010, became both the first woman to lead either party in the Georgia General Assembly and the first African American leading the House of Representatives in the state. As a politician, Abrams has made a name for herself as a "pragmatist willing to do deals with the Republicans" and has been a rising star for years, particularly after giving a splashy speech at the 2016 Democratic National Convention about economic inequality.
This article was last updated on Feb. 5, 2019. Additional reporting by Rayna Rossitto.
Why Being Single on Valentine's Day Is the Best
Every Valentine's Day, I get texts from a few of my married friends that say things like, "I know Valentine's Day can be rough. Thinking of you!" I always respond with, "Awww. Love you! Happy V-Day," but if I'm being honest, I don't really get their sympathy. While I know they mean well, to me, being unattached is the way to go on Valentine's Day.
It's not that I think my loved-up friends have made a mistake, it's just they're the ones I feel a little bad for. Valentine's Day is one when expectations are extremely high and prix fixe menu prices are even higher.
I always have a great time on Valentine's Day because I don't have to deal with any of that pressure and still get showered with love. Yep, I'm going to let you in on a little secret: being single on Valentine's Day means you can have your cake and eat it too (literally!). So, if you're also riding solo this February, here are a few of the best perks to enjoy the day of love without a partner.
1. You Still Feel the Love
Sharing the love is one of the best parts about this day, and the fact that you don't have a designated valentine means you can spread your love far and wide! Text those kissy emoji to your gal pals, your grandma, your nieces and nephews, your longtime crush, and whoever else makes you smile. Blow a kiss to a firefighter, a businesswoman, or a random dog on the street. It's Valentine's Day, you're adorable, and you're completely free.
Putting this energy out there also isn't just good for your soul, you'll probably get it back in droves. By firing up your dating apps or heading out with friends, you're opening yourself up to receive that same love. On what some pessimists call "Singles Awareness Day," other nonvalentines are very much down to clown. A Tinder spokesperson confirmed this surge to POPSUGAR, saying, "Globally, Tinder saw a 10 percent increase in downloads on Valentine's Day in 2018." Hinge's Head of Communications Jean Marie McGrath also told POPSUGAR that the app sees a 10 percent uptick in dates being set up the week of Valentine's Day. Long story short? Get your flirt on and let the compliments roll in!
2. You Get to Do Whatever You Want
While couples everywhere stare intently into one another's eyes over a pricey meal in a crowded restaurant, us singles will be busy doing whatever the heck we want. I prefer a night out with some fellow single ladies, but if you're not in the socializing mood, a great way to participate is to celebrate glorious, wonderful you. Do something indulgent like buying yourself expensive sheets, taking a bubble bath, or ordering ice cream to be delivered to your doorstep (yep, that's a thing). What better way to remind yourself how great you are than to treat yourself the way you'd like to be treated? Sure, a special someone may not be in your life right at this moment, but setting expectations for how you want to be adored is a healthy, productive, and, most importantly, fun exercise that's perfectly fitting for Valentine's Day.
3. You're Guilt-Free
I don't know about you, but I've definitely known I was with the wrong person on past Valentine's Days, but stayed with them anyway because I didn't want to break up on the most romantic day of the year. I'm older and wiser now, which means I know that a mud mask and bubble bath for one is a lot better than arguing over a dinner reservation with someone who doesn't treat me well. If you're with the wrong person leading up to Valentine's Day, end it and don't feel bad or guilty about it. That might seem a little dark, but your own self-care and happiness should come first. Decide to love yourself, and that will always feel better than not being loved properly by someone else.
4. You Don't Have to Force It
You know when you get home from a nice dinner and you take off your jacket, give your date a suggestive glance, then scan the room and wonder how you can ditch your Spanx and simultaneously kill the lights so no one sees your after-dinner bloat? Sometimes you just don't feel that sexy after a big meal, which you inevitably had to have, because it's one of the many traps of a traditional Valentine's Day. We singles don't have to deal with that. Instead, we either find ourselves happily bloated with our pants unbuttoned in the comfort of our own homes or out with our buds having a relaxed time while maybe catching the eye of a stranger (if we feel like it). There's no end-of-night pressure to get busy or even look good. We can come home and let it all hang out.
So, whether you're single or attached this Valentine's Day, remember that both ways have it made. Being with a partner you truly love is awesome, but being single is pretty awesome, too.
Attention All Parents! You Need to Know About the Awesome "Every Kid in a Park" Program
Traveling with kids is not easy. It always feels like more of a trip than a vacation, and one challenge my family usually runs into is finding a place that will make everyone happy while not breaking the bank. That's why it was a pleasant surprise when my son came home from school one day and told me about the "Every Kid in a Park" program.
"Every Kid in a Park" is a nationwide program that gives any fourth grader and their entire family free entry into any of the 59 beautiful national parks in the US for an entire year! In addition to being an excellent way to get kids outside and exploring nature, the program also makes a national parks vacation more affordable. According to the program's website, "'Every Kid in a Park' was created so fourth graders and their families could discover our wildlife, resources, and history for free."
My son received his park pass at school, but any fourth grader could also follow the instructions to receive their own pass online. When we traveled to Yellowstone National Park last Summer, my son was thrilled to be able to use his own special pass to get us into the park (your fourth grader has to be with you when you enter the park, because the rangers will check). And if you don't have a fourth grader but would still like to visit a national park for free, you could plan a trip on one of the free entrance days they offer every year. In 2019, free days are:
- Jan. 21
- April 20
- Aug. 25
- Sept. 28
- Nov. 11
Franklin D. Roosevelt famously said, "There is nothing so American as our national parks. The fundamental idea behind the parks is that the country belongs to the people, that it is in process of making for the enrichment of the lives of all of us." Programs like "Every Kid in a Park" help make that possible for families, so spread the word!
The Sexiest Books of All Time Will Have You Blushing With Every Turn of the Page
Sexiness in books is preconceived to be limited to romance novels, but it's more than that. It's a universal concept that takes on many connotations about having power and agency and challenging old norms about sex. Whether it's Lolita and Anna Karenina for class or picking up Zane's book for pleasure (pun intended), these stories center on a woman's narrative or celebrate sexuality in a liberating way that's not exclusive to romance. Books that were considered too scandalous and taboo for society are now being praised for their revolutionary schools of thought, particularly now because we are at a juncture in society where we're having open discourses about sex and pushing marginalized voices to the forefront. The impressive books on this list have been doing that way before it registered in our collective consciousness.
Say "Yes" to Portability With the Help of Walmart's 8 Top-Rated Bluetooth Earbuds
Last week, my friend told me AirPods were sold out in New York City. "There's a two-month waiting list," she said. I gasped. Investing in them last Summer was a total game-changer; they simplified my daily commute (no more getting my wires crossed with subway passengers - literally) and made me feel more mobile during workouts.
No one should have to wait that long to reap the benefits of Bluetooth headphones, so I've rounded up a list of impressive - not to mention, more affordable - alternatives to AirPods to scope out below. Not only do they have a similar in-ear design for maximum portability, but they all have received top ratings at Walmart, too.
Did You Know? You Can Score 2019's Hottest Gadgets For Less Than $50!
We love technology because it makes our lives so much easier, and one of the most exciting parts of a new year is seeing all the fun, innovative gadgets to hit the market. The only thing better than new tech toys are ones that won't break the bank, and in 2019, there are plenty of cool finds for less than $50. You read that right. Just keep reading to shop our picks!
Leave Your Jeans at Home - These 11 Stylish Pants Are Perfect For Traveling
As you pack for your next trip, there's one item you won't want to leave behind: a pair of comfy pants. These stylish trousers are easy to wear on the plane, rock with sneakers in the day, or dress up with heels for dinner by night. To make sure you find your perfect match, we shopped and uncovered 11 choices for every type of vacation. Keep reading to shop our favorites.
People Are Giving Nancy Pelosi a Standing Ovation For Her State of the Union Clapping
It's only February, but perhaps you're already in need of a new 2019 mood. Please, allow me to introduce Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi's State of the Union clapping, for your clever and sarcastic usage. During President Donald Trump's controversial address on Feb. 5, he encouraged politicians to abandon revenge politics. Pelosi stood to applauded loudly in Trump's direction, possibly sending a message of her own. The internet quickly took notice and turned her standing ovation into the meme we all desperately need, when words aren't enough.
After the longest government shut-down in US history, a public back-and-forth over the State of the Union, and a series of offensive tweets, it's no surprise Pelosi's clapping for Trump was a bit incredulous. People began tweeting their own reactions to Pelosi's pointed applause, turning this brief blip into a viral-sensation. Watch the moment as it occurred above, and then keep reading to see people give their own ovation to Madam Speaker.
We Out Here: An Open Letter From POPSUGAR Editors
It is both a thrilling and frightening time to be a black woman. While we're running for office, smashing box office records, writing Great American Novels, and shaping the culture, we are also navigating a world in which we're still being undervalued, underpaid, and underappreciated. In the midst of that, though, is community - black women coming together on the internet and IRL to hold space and fix one another's crowns. Whether we're hyping one another up on the 'gram or taking it offline for a few intentional breaths, one thing is clear: if no one else has us, we'll always have each other.
With that in mind, POPSUGAR is celebrating the breadth and diversity of black women by creating a space for you - and us - to be seen. We Out Here is a place where you will discover everything from the best black-hosted podcasts to accompany your morning commute to beauty brands that give back and how to find a therapist who has your best interest at heart and manage your mental health (because that's super important, too). We recognize the triumphs and the heartbreaks because, for better or worse, we win and lose together. Not only are we out here, but we're not going anywhere, either.
With love,
Tembe Denton-Hurst, Britt Stephens, Meki Pierre, Brea Cubit, Danielle Jackson, Tamara Pridgett, and Maya Berry
Attention, Singles: Get Ready to Swipe Right on the Most Popular Dating Day of the Year
That's right, all you singles out there, Jan. 6 has been declared "Dating Sunday," so it's time to get out your OpenTable app, get some flowers (or chocolates, if you ask me), and show someone some love. Hinge is predicting that Jan. 6 will be the biggest day in dating history, according to various surveys it has conducted for the past two years.
The Numbers Are In
After looking over activity data from the past two years on the Sunday right after New Year's Day, Hinge found that there was a spike in conversations. Listen up. In 2017, 41 percent more people began conversations on the app on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before. The pattern continued. In 2018, 59 percent more people started conversations on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before.
It appears this surge in new conversations (recorded as being based on phone numbers exchanged) is steadily rising, so 2019 will likely follow suit. The same goes for planned activities and meetups. There was also an increase in dates being set up (based on phone numbers exchanged) for those two years. In 2017, 36 percent more people set up dates on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before. In 2018, 62 percent more people set up dates on the first Sunday after New Year's than they did the week before.
Well, as the numbers don't lie, it appears that that Sunday is the busiest day of the week for dating. According to Hinge's data, there was a 36 percent higher response to messages and 20 percent more conversations among users. Additionally, Hinge found that on "Dating Sunday" in 2017, the app saw a 16 percent increase in daily user activity, and in 2018, that number shot up to 23 percent. The app expects to see an even greater increase in the number of new Hinge profiles, conversations, and planned dates on Jan. 6, as singles are looking to meet someone fun and special for 2019. And as for couples, take advantage of the day and do something new and exciting together!
If you need some dating ideas, try something wintry, like ice skating or skiing, if accessible. You can also check out a cool new bar or a cozy speakeasy that's a bit more intimate. If there's some bubbly and a fireplace, even better. If you live somewhere warmer, go for a walk, bike around the city, or grab drinks outside on a patio. You can even try a fitness date, as January is a great month to work on those fitness and wellness resolutions. Pick something fun and seize the day!
If These 22 Things Described Your Relationship, You Should Be HAPPY You Broke Up
Nobody ever jumps for joy after going through a breakup - we're not going to pretend that you should in any way be celebrating the end of your relationship with Champagne and toasts. Even when everyone around you says that you made the right choice, it can still be hard to let go. I'm speaking from legitimate experience when I say that I get it. When you're still reeling from the breakup, and after you put so much into the relationship, it's easy to begin to question why you're letting it go and moving on. These are the 22 signs that you did in fact make the right choice to end things - read 'em and rest a little bit easier, then start making moves to move on!
- You always feared that they would leave you.
- You had more admiration for other couples than you did yourself and your SO.
- When you think back on what the relationship was like, the bad memories come up first.
- Jealousy was a major dynamic between the two of you.
- They made you feel bad for the things you're interested in.
- You didn't feel like they supported your career goals.
- You lost friends because of the relationship.
- There was a constant struggle for superiority; the two of you were never equals.
- Either of you would divulge that they missed the "old version" of the other.
- You didn't feel comfortable around their family, or vice versa.
- You felt like you had to hide an aspect of who you are to maintain their approval.
- Either of you had to vie for affection.
- You or they were constantly worried about what the other was doing when you were apart.
- Even small conflicts turned into tumultuous arguments.
- There were double standards - things that one of you could do that the other couldn't.
- Either of you were continually threatening to end the relationship.
- The relationship more often felt draining than it did uplifting.
- Your friends and family think the two of you are better off apart.
- You depended more on others for emotional support than you did your significant other.
- You often found yourself lashing out at your partner, sometimes without really knowing why.
- Your lives never fully (or easily) melded together.
- You were more often worried about your future together than you were excited for it.
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