Healthy lifestyle
A healthy lifestyle is one which helps to keep and improve people's health and well-being.Many governments and non-governmental organizations have made big efforts in healthy lifestyle and health promotion.
Mental Health
Mental health can be considered a very important factor of physical health for the effects it produces on bodily functions. This type of health concerns emotional and cognitive well-being or an absence of mental disorder.
Public health
Public health can be defined in a variety of ways. It can be presented as "the study of the physical, psychosocial and socio-cultural determinants of population health and actions to improve the health of the population.
Reproductive Health
For the UN, reproductive health is a right, like other human rights. This recent concept evokes the good transmission of the genetic heritage from one generation to the next.
Health
Health is a state of complete physical, mental and social well-being, and not merely the absence of disease or infirmity.
mardi 12 juin 2018
9 Tips For Having More Intense Orgasms
Orgasms are wonderful, but there is always room for improvement. What do we mean by this? Well, sex is a journey, not a destination. It's about exploring your body and finding new pathways to pleasure. Orgasms come in all shapes and sizes. Some are small, and some are large; some are intense AF, and some are meh.
But did you know that your orgasm potential is (to some degree) in your control? If you're dreaming of more intense orgasms, look no further. POPSUGAR spoke to real women and experts to bring you the best tips for how to have more intense orgasms.
1. Keep it going even after you come
How to do it: "Keep going. Don't stop after your first orgasm, even if your body feels sensitive. My third orgasm is usually the strongest because everything is hyper aroused." - Olive, 30
"If you feel that one part of your body is getting overstimulated - try switching to another for the subsequent orgasm. Listen to your body and reengage after each orgasm to maintain arousal." - Alex Fine, founder of Dame Products
Why it works: "I find if vulva owners can stay aroused rather than completely cooling down after an orgasm, this can be helpful in experiencing multiple orgasms. Think about it like this - the body is already warmed up and in the mode, so it's easier to bring it back to a heightened place than starting all over again." - Alicia Sinclair, founder of B-Vibe and Le Wand
2. Masturbate, masturbate, masturbate
How to do it: Don't be shameful or awkward about your masturbation habits. Take some time to really enjoy yourself. Draw a bath, put on music that turns you on, and grab your favorite vibe. Devote time to the practice. Masturbation is self-care.
Why it works: "Experiencing pleasure is about being connected to your body and your partner. The better you get to know yourself through masturbation, the better you can communicate your desires and guide your partner to help you climax - and help yourself get there during solo sessions. Ultimately, communication during partnered sex is the key to maximized pleasure. It's also imperative to get out of your head and enjoy the experience instead of focusing on an end result. Orgasms are all about the release." - Mia Davis, founder of the sexual education website and app Tabú
3. Utilize the Lap Dance position
How to do it: Have your partner sit on a chair. It'll likely work best if he or she sits all the way back in the seat with their legs wide open. From a standing position, slowly back up to meet him or her, and gently glide his penis/her dildo into your vagina.
Why it works: "I'm a big fan of the Lap Dance position, specifically because the woman is in control, the clitoris is easily stimulated, and both partner's hands are available to stimulate other parts of the body (like your breasts, nipples, or wrap you in a sexy embrace). Also, depending on the angle at which you arch your body, you can stimulate the g-spot or a-spot. This position is also a great form of foreplay - especially if you do wish to start with an actual lap dance. I also like to suggest using a vibrator in this position. Start by teasing your partner with the vibrator before you begin using it on yourself. " - Alicia Sinclair
4. Close your eyes
How to do it: "Close your eyes and really focus on your body! Being aware of everything your partner is doing and touching will make your orgasm 10x better." - Juliana, 25
Why it works: When you close your eyes, you cut off one of your main sensory ports. This will make everything you feel extreme (in a good way). Really lean into everything that is happening to you, and pay attention to each nerve ending.
5. Edging to get you over the edge
How to do it: "Essentially, you slowly bring yourself closer and closer to coming but hold back before going over the edge. The buildup really intensifies the orgasm (seriously, you have to try it), and by prolonging the whole juicy process, it makes everything more fun in general (whether you're solo or with a friend or two!)." - Dr. Nadia Kumentas ND, founder of the holistic wellness site Mingo Health
Why it works: Growing your pleasure threshold will only make the final release that much more explosive. When you become aroused and then let it go, the energy is recycled, waiting just under the surface to be ignited once again. It you keep building toward a finale, the endgame will be unreal.
6. Kegels are key
How to do it: Your kegel muscles are what keep everything tight and strong below the waist. To give them a workout, stop the flow of urine when you're taking a wee. This will help you locate the kegels. Next, hold your kegels in for 30 seconds, twice a day.
Why it works: "Do kegels. Once you've mastered those, you can actually do them while your man is inside of you and your orgasm will be super intense." - BSM Stoneking, erotic author and sex expert
When your kegels are tight, you can feel everything happening during sex more acutely. You're more in control of your body. The stronger the kegels, the more powerful your orgasms. Your partner will love it, too.
7. Breathe into it
How to do it: Utilize all of those techniques you've heard of in yoga and Pilates classes. Breathe deeply and consciously during your entire sexual experience. It's easy to get excited and hold your breath. Avoid doing this.
Why it works: "The breath is of number one importance. It keeps the body loose and receptive, easier to arouse." - Dr. Elayne Daniels, PhD
8. Find a vibe you love
How to do it: A small vibrator can make all the difference during sex. Try something small and easy to maneuver like the Fin from Dame Products or the Crave Bullet.
Why it works: "During penetrative sex, it is difficult to achieve the much-needed clitorial stimulation to get to orgasm. Having a small vibrator in hand will give you the ability to get your clitoris in on the action. If you can combine g-spot and clitorial stimulation during sex, you'll be on your way to the best orgasm of your life." - Maria, 29
9. "Tipping the scales" (for two people with vulvas)
How to do it: Your partner lies on their back and you get on top with your legs framing your partner's face (almost like a 69 position). Prop yourself up with your arms and move your hips back so your clit is in line with your partner's face.
Why it works: "It's super comfortable for your partner and is pretty much a prime orgasm position for you. Your partner can hold your hips steady and pull you towards their face - they have total control, which is super hot. It also feels AMAZING if your partner throws in a little simultaneous vaginal penetration with fingers or a toy. Then you can switch!" - The team at Unbound, a sexual wellness and sex toy subscription company
I'm Mexican-American, but I Won't Call Myself Chicana
Image Source: Natalie Rivera
My family was nothing out of the ordinary when I was growing up. My parents came to the US in their teens from their respective homes in Mexico, crossing the border illegally, only to become US citizens in the '80s under the Reagan administration. I was born in North Hollywood, CA, and was raised in nearby San Fernando. When I was around 4 years old, my mother worked shifts at the McDonald's drive-through at 5 a.m. when she was pregnant with my younger brother. My father worked landscaping and delivered Domino's pizza over the weekend up until I was about 10 years old. Every month was another baptism, communion, birthday party, quinceañera, or wedding with my very large Mexican family (I have roughly 75 cousins. No, seriously. My dad and I counted.). My aunts and uncles all came into this country under similar circumstances; one of my father's brothers also delivered Domino's pizza to make a living.
I still can't seem to bring myself to identify with one specific label: Chicana
My middle and high schools, like the neighborhood, were predominately Latinx, specifically Mexican-American. Most of my classmates were first-generation, and some of them were Mexican immigrants themselves. Friends, bullies, crushes, and even teachers weren't too different from me. We were almost all, in one way or another, a product of the Mexican-American experience, whether that meant having parents who crossed the border or simply growing up with Univision playing in the background 24/7. It wasn't until after college that I began meeting more people who weren't Angelenos. To this day, people who I meet for the first time in the city (I now live in Koreatown, a mere 30 to 40 minute drive from home) still tell me how rare it is that they meet someone who is actually from LA. Little do they know they're unicorns for me, too.
Because so many of the friends, coworkers, and acquaintances I've met in the last several years do not look like me, I've felt I've had a responsibility to share my upbringing with them. I was in my mid-20s the first time I described myself as first-gen, a term that wasn't a thing where I grew up since everyone just assumed you were one. Because of our political climate, I feel more inclined to self-describe as a Mexican-American, first-gen, or - as one of my protest signs once read - "The proud daughter of Mexican immigrants." But while I'm glad to share my family's story, I still can't seem to bring myself to identify with one specific label: Chicana.
The Meaning of Chicano and Chicana
Merriam-Webster defines the word "Chicana" as an American woman or girl of Mexican descent. By dictionary definition, yes, I am Chicana, but growing up the word seemed, at least to me, to have a different connotation.
While historians can't pinpoint the word's exact origins, Chicano - or the female Chicana - has been widely used to describe Mexican-Americans in the US since the early 20th century. For a while, the word was a pejorative, used to describe Mexican-Americans of low social standing. Chicanos reclaimed the word during the Mexican-American civil rights movement in the '60s, also known as the Chicano Movement, which was led by a new generation of Mexican-Americans, mainly in California and Texas, who demanded better labor conditions for migrant farmers, political empowerment, and school reform. Two of the movement's most prominent leaders were Cesar Chavez and Dolores Huerta, who cofounded the United Farm Workers of America, the country's first farmers union and a major win for the labor movement.
My hometown is widely proud of its Chicano history. We have a mural dedicated to Chavez, and our local cafes will usually have at least one piece of Chicano art hanging on the walls. My teachers taught us about Chavez's legacy in middle school, and the university I went to - also in the valley - has a Chicana/o studies department. Yet, the word to me meant more than its Merriam-Webster definition; it meant you were a woke Mexican-American, one willing to fight for la raza, or the race. Students at my school who identified as Chicano/a seemed well-versed in the injustices faced by our people, both past and current, and dedicated to combating them. Because of this, Chicano/a seemed more than just a label or term. It was a way of living, and so self-identifying as one meant you weren't just Mexican-American, but a proud, activist Mexican-American.
Whether it was immigrant rights, or just a deeply felt appreciation of Chavez's and Huertas' efforts, proud Chicana/os I've come across always seemed to be self-aware. I was not - or at least not to that extent. I was never involved in any student protest or political demonstrations growing up, and any time I learned something else about the Chicana/o Movement, I merely took in the knowledge without applying it into my daily life. I felt some guilt over this, but like many teens my interests didn't include activism or politics, but mostly music, magazines, Harry Potter and, well, boys (16-year-old me would have done poorly on a Bechdel Test.) Also, because the community I grew up in was predominately Mexican-American, I rarely witnessed discrimination towards Latinxs. In fact, white kids were more likely to be the outcasts. While TV and film told a different story, everyone in the community I grew up in pretty much looked the same. Because of this, I was more or less ignorant about the the Latinx struggle. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I didn't care, it's just that it never resonated with me the way it did with some of my classmates.
While I do now, as an adult, participate in protests, and have created content bringing awareness to immigration rights, I do not feel my political activism can compare to that demonstrated during the Chicano Movement. Therefore I do not feel comfortable identifying as Chicana, and gravitate more to the labels Mexican-American and Latina. Even though I am, by definition, Chicana, I do not feel a personal connection to the word, nor do I feel my experience as a Mexican-American reflects that of the Chicano Movement or Chicano culture.
How Do We Shape Our Own Identities as Mexican-Americans?
I spoke to Gabriel Gutiérrez, department chair of Chicana and Chicano studies at California State University Northridge - which happens to be my alma mater - about the history of the word. Like me, Gutierrez also believes the word is more than its dictionary definition. However, he also believes the evolution of the term extends beyond the Chicano Movement. According to Gutierrez, for some people, the term has cultural connotations. Because we are Mexican-American, there is the expectation of being equally as Mexican as we are American, therefore making some of us desperate for a label that embodies our particular experience.
"You're going to have folks who identify with the term as sort of an alternative between Mexican and American identities," Gutiérrez told me. "In part because of the notion or the idea or the experience of not being considered, or not considering yourself, authentically Mexican or authentically American."
While self-identification can play a huge role in the Latinx community, just because a person gravitates to one label more than another doesn't mean the term itself is more or less accurate. In Mexico, some people choose to identify with their home state as opposed to their birth country. For example, someone might be more inclined to call themselves Michoacána than Mexican, identifying more closely with the state of Michoacán as opposed to just Mexico. Not one label is necessarily better than the other; it's just the way am individual feels more comfortable identifying. Because there are so many layers to a person, there are are multitudes of ways someone can identity, especially if you add heritage into the equation. And as Gutiérrez pointed out, our identity is not always fixed, but is often fluid. "In reality, many people experience multiple identities as they go through life," he explained. "So, the first realization might be a response to something they see in the news ,or a response to a particular law. Basically, the deeper of understanding in that regard, then the more types of identities come to form along those lines."
Gutiérrez also said that while some people do use Chicano/a as a literal term to mean born of Mexican parents, some people call themselves "Chicano/a" as a way to show pride. Like the activists of the Chicano Movement, some people might use the term to reclaim their heritage - something Mexican-Americans have historically been made to feel ashamed of, either by cultural prejudices or institutionalized racism.
"You have folks from kindergarten and on who are being taught to be be ashamed of their parents, or be ashamed of who they were," Gutierrez explained. "[They were taught] to not want to speak Spanish, and so that was inverted in a sense where people were looking at a combination of expression . . . of self-affirmation."
The struggle for self-affirmation and belonging is one I've personally dealt with most my life, and something I still have trouble grasping even in my late 20s. I used to envy the American families depicted on TV, wishing I came from a home that was uncomplicated, that allowed me to see my father on the weekends, and didn't come with the pressure of having to know two cultures and languages equally. I am ashamed to admit this now, but there was a lot of embarrassment that came with growing up Mexican-American - at least for me. Whether it was embarrassing myself with my broken Spanish or feeling left out because I didn't grow up watching Seinfeld or Friends, being a young, Mexican-American woman was so conflicting, I'd sometimes resent my own culture.
Looking back now, I've realized that this pressure, though sometimes enforced by family members and classmates, was really my own doing. Though I won't ever get the years I wasted stressing over the ideal Mexican-American woman I felt I had to live up to back, I can instead live my life subscribing myself to labels and identities I feel most comfortable with. As of now, those labels don't include the word "Chicana," and that's just fine. It should not be taken as an insult or a diss to those who do choose to embrace the term, but for what it is: my own personal, genuine self-reflection. On top of the many rights my people fought for, I have a feeling they also fought for the freedom of proudly and freely determining your own identity - and that's good enough for me.
18 People Who Are in Line For the Presidency If Trump Is Removed From Office
If you're suddenly curious as to who becomes president in case President Donald Trump resigns, dies, or is impeached, take a look at the 18 people in line for succession. Called the Presidential Succession Act, the law has a long history of changes, with the last one taking place in 2006.
The first iteration of the Presidential Succession Act in 1792 stated the Senate president pro tempore would be next in line after the vice president. On July 18, 1947, President Harry Truman signed the Presidential Succession Act of 1947. This act changed the line of succession in two ways; first it reinstated the Senate president pro tempore and speaker of the House to the succession plan. Secondly, it also placed the speaker of the House right after the vice president instead of the Senate president pro tempore. The last change to the act came in 2006, when the USA Patriot Improvement and Reauthorization Act of 2005 added the secretary of Homeland Security to the list.
In Trump's administration, here's the full line of succession.
- Vice President Mike Pence
- Speaker of the House Paul Ryan
- Senate President Pro Tempore Orrin Hatch
- Secretary of State Rex Tillerson
- Secretary of the Treasury Steven Mnuchin
- Secretary of Defense James Mattis
- Attorney General Jeff Sessions
- Secretary of the Interior Ryan Zinke
- Secretary of Agriculture Sonny Perdue
- Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross
- Secretary of Labor Alexander Acosta
- Secretary of Health and Human Services Tom Price
- Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Ben Carson
- Secretary of Transportation Elaine Chao
- Secretary of Energy Rick Perry
- Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos
- Secretary of Veterans Affairs David Shulkin
- Secretary of Homeland Security John Kelly
The only caveat here is that Secretary of Transportation Elaine Chao isn't eligible since she was born in Taipei, Taiwan, and is therefore not a US-born citizen. While it's still uncertain whether or not we'll need to refer to this list in the future, at least we know who we can expect.
Add These 7 Wellness Apps to Your Daily Self-Care Routine ASAP
Our busy schedules don't always allow us to drop into a much-needed yoga class, but that's no excuse to make your personal wellness any less of a priority. Luckily, there's an app for almost everything - including for yoga, meditation, mindfulness, and overall self-care. Ahead are some of our favorite tools to help you live a healthier and happier life.
If You Do This 1 Disney World Vacation Hack, You're Guaranteed to Have the Best Time
Planning a trip to Disney World can feel like an overwhelming task. Sure, it's fun and truly makes everyone's dreams come true (it's the happiest place on Earth, after all), but getting there and feeling like you're getting the most out of your trip can be anxiety-inducing. There are a million tips out there for how to plan a Disney vacation the right way, but trying to incorporate all those tips might just increase your stress levels more than assuage them.
So, from a mom who's been there, here's the one and only hack you really need to make your trip to Disney World as unforgettable as you hope it'll be: focus on booking three things - lodging, dining, and FastPass+ - as early as the park will allow; then let the rest go. As my mom reminded me before my daughter's first trip to Disney, "If you go on three rides, it will still be the best day of her life." I agree, but getting on the rides she wanted, plus having a place to eat and sleep is kind of important, too.
Here's the bare minimum of what you need to stress about to make your trip as magical as possible. Focus on these three things, and you're golden.
Lodging
Start researching your Disney resort options as soon as you know you're planning a trip. There are so many places to stay within Walt Disney World at a wide range of price points that move depending on demand, so do your research to find the right spot for your family. If you're booking your lodging online, you can't do so until Disney releases the next year's rates, which is usually in August of the previous year (for example, if you're going in February 2019, you won't be able to book until August 2018).
However, you can call Disney before that and make a room-only reservation. They will charge you for a single night based on this year's rate, and then automatically adjust your reservation once the 2019 pricing is released. At that point, you can also convert your room-only reservation into a Disney Vacation Package reservation, adding dates, dining packages, and discounted park tickets. You'll also be able to customize your complimentary Magic Bands through your reservation.
Dining
You can reserve dining at all the Disney table-service restaurants up to 180 days in advance, which is a big win when it comes to planning your travels. The most popular restaurants - the Magic Kingdom's Cinderella's Royal Table and Be Our Guest (the only restaurant that serves alcohol in the park), and all character dining experiences in Epcot, Hollywood Studios, and Animal Kingdom - will book up quickly during high-traffic times, so book as soon as possible. Some restaurants will require that you pay for your meal when you reserve, but if you have to cancel later, they'll give you a refund.
FastPass+
Your FastPass+ is your get-out-of-line free card for each park, so use them wisely. Each member of your group can book up to three Fastpass+ credits for each day, so you'll want to get the most out of them. Do some research into what rides and attractions are can't-misses for your group, prioritizing Fastpass+ for those with the longest lines. Then, try to book them as early as you can (30 days in advance, or 60 days for those staying at a resort hotel). The most popular rides and character meetings book up quickly, so mark your calendar.
Be sure to read the FastPass+ fine print, as some of the parks (such as Epcot) have tiered systems that restrict the use of more than one Fastpass+ in a top tier (you will have to choose between Frozen Ever After and Soarin'), whereas others (like Animal Kingdom) may make you choose between certain high-demand rides (such as Avatar Flight of Passage and Na'vi River Journey).
Also, be aware of the times you're booking for your FastPass+ credits, as well. Once you use all three FastPass+ in one day, you'll be able to book more while you're in the park, which means that if all your reservations are scheduled before early afternoon, you'll have plenty of time to score a couple more. However, mornings (usually before 11 a.m.) are the slowest time at the parks, so arrive early enough (take advantage of Extra Magic Hours if you're staying on the property), and you might be able to get on your favorite rides without waiting in line anyway. Strategy is key.
9 Beautiful Beaches Where Clothing Is 100% Optional
If you're one of those people who just loathes having tan lines, then may I suggest you check out a beach where clothing is completely optional? Yes, there are a slew of beaches across the world where nudity is celebrated and no one has a care in the world. You may even be surprised to know that there are some right here in the United States. If being free to bare it all sounds like the perfect way to spend your next vacation, consider one of these nine lovely locales.
Your Kids . . . According to Their Zodiac Signs
It would be great if, along with the pillow-sized maxi pads, enormous mesh undies, and teeny-tiny diapers, someone would tuck a how-to manual inside our hospital bags when we take our new babies home. I don't mean a generalized manifesto of "this is a baby and here's how you keep it alive" - I mean a guide specifically geared toward the particular model we're tasked with parenting. But let's face it: coffeemakers come with more detailed instructions than babies do.
When it comes to raising our kids, it's a guessing game, and their personalities are a huge factor in how easy it'll be. We must navigate through life anticipating their reactions to certain scenarios, and they're all different; one kid is clinging to our legs when we try to drop him off at day care, and the next one is trying to unbuckle herself and get out before the car even stops moving.
But there is a way we can be at least a little bit clued-in to our kids' innate personalities, the things that make them tick (and the things that make them ticked-off): we can look at their zodiac signs. By knowing a little bit about the classic characteristics of our offspring's ruling sign, we can gain some insight into what drives them. Flighty or fearless, bubbly or bashful, their traits can depend on their horoscope - and we've got the scoop on what to expect from each.
- Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 20)
Capricorn kiddos are old souls, and you'll sometimes marvel at their level of maturity (it can seem like they're wise senior citizens living in young bodies). Because of this, they gravitate toward older friends, and adore spending time with Mom and Dad.
They are ambitious and diligent, stable and consistent, and will actually help keep you on schedule; consistency is key for kids born under the sign of the Goat. Their determination is unwavering, but that can also mean they're stubborn when it comes to any change in plans or deviation from their usual path. Introduce any changes slowly, and appreciate your little Capricorn's love of stability - and unparalleled loyalty.
- Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19)
Fiercely independent and possessing a great need for personal space, Aquarian kids may not be the type to crave physical closeness (no "huggers" here!), but don't be offended - it's just that they're too busy exploring their environment to spend much time being cuddled.
From the time they're babies, they'll be poking their noses into every available nook and cranny, and by the time they're teens, they'll be begging you to allow them to travel alone (eek!). Adventure is the Aquarius kid's middle name, and they tend to be on the unconventional side, preferring to dance to their own drummer. Prepare for a bit of rebellion if you attempt, as parents do, to rein your little Aquarian in. Allow for as much independence as you (and your child) can handle, and remember that a traditional path, in an Aquarian's eyes, is not always the best one.
- Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20)
Pisces kids are prone to - as Katy Perry would put it - catching "feels." They are super sensitive to the energies around them, and their emotions run high. They wear their huge, open hearts on their sleeves, showing compassion and caring for the vulnerable without realizing that they, themselves, are vulnerable.
Like a real live fish, your Pieces child may be a little on the shy side, seeking refuge in a hiding place from time to time. I hope the paint on your walls is washable, because sensitive Fish may find solace from emotional overload in anything artsy; Piscean kids have rich and fanciful imaginations and love being creative, whether through drawing or writing or simply acting out dramatic scenes with toys. Their considerate nature means they give ceaselessly of themselves, so make sure you refill their cup with a lot of love and nurturing.
- Aries (March 21-April 20)
You've got an Aries? Better have insurance. And caffeine. Aries kiddos are spunky, energetic little fireballs who want to explore everything headfirst . . . whether you want them to or not. They possess a magnificent sense of determination, which will be a great asset when they get older, but may cause them to butt heads when their strong will clashes with yours (hey, their symbol is the ram, after all).
They are natural-born leaders (read: kinda bossy) who can quickly become frustrated when things don't go their way, but a few encouraging words and a pat on the back can quickly recharge your little Aries's go-getter spirit. They love applause!
- Taurus (April 21-May 21)
Have you ever heard the term "stubborn as a bull"? It's accurate when it comes to the miniature bulls of the zodiac: aka Taurus kids. Very set in their ways, trying to change a tiny Taurus's mind can be an exercise in futility.
But bulls are strong and solid, and so are Taurus children - both literally and figuratively. They'll rarely be sick, and their steady, dependable temperament and thoughtful disposition make them lovable despite their occasionally inflexible nature. They thrive on a consistent daily routine; it gives them the feeling of stability that they crave. And when your Bull is showing those horns, your best bet is to be a calm, quieting influence.
- Gemini (May 22-June 21)
Be prepared to say a lot of "mm-hmm," because you won't be able to get a word in edgewise with a Gemini kid in the house. Their interests are diverse and ever-changing, and their sociable personalities make them want to talk about it all (in detail), so you're in for a lifetime of listening.
Fortunately, though, Geminis are gregarious and funny; you'll be entertained by their exuberant nature and zest for communication. You'll also be exhausted trying to keep up, because your little Gemini will change preferences like most people change underwear - which means there will also be a lot of unfinished projects. But just remind yourself that each new undertaking is satisfying your Gemini's rabid curiosity and keeping them from getting bored, as they so easily tend to do.
- Cancer (June 22-July 22)
The symbol of the Cancer child is a crab, and it's fitting - because kids born under the Cancer sign make good use of their figurative "shell." They are naturally sensitive, and when feelings overwhelm them, they retreat protectively into themselves just like an actual crab would.
Despite their armor, they are easily hurt, so watch what you say when you're irritated; even if you don't mean it, your angry words (or anyone else's, for that matter) will pierce your little crab right through the heart. But as inconvenient as their sensitivity can be at times, it's also an asset, because those soft hearts are made of gold. Cancer kids are caring and considerate. They don't like to lead, and sometimes prefer solitude to the company of others, so keep that in mind when you're planning their extracurricular activities.
- Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
Leo kids are the lion cubs of the zodiac, and you'll definitely hear them roar; they are nothing if not opinionated. Their way is the best way (just ask them!) and they enjoy being number one, which can make it a bit difficult to be a team player sometimes - they'd rather lead the team than just be a member of it.
Leos want to be the best at everything and are particularly disappointed when they feel they aren't, so positive reinforcement goes a long way for these little Lions. They are proud and love to feel important. Any opportunity to make them feel like leaders is welcome, and appealing to that ego will work in every aspect of their lives . . . even if it's just telling them that you're having them unload the dishwasher because no one else does it better.
- Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 23)
"Perfection" is the keyword for children born under the sign of the Virgin - not because they are perfect, but because you'll never see anybody try harder to achieve that status. They are typically tidy and fastidious, meticulously tending to every little thing from their rooms to their personal hygiene to their health (for dinner last night my family went to a pizza buffet, and my Virgo son opted to hit up the salad bar instead; that's a Virgo in a nutshell).
Virgo kids are naturally helpful, because anything they can do to contribute to an orderly and peaceful environment, they'll do. But because they're such creatures of habit, and so determined to make everything perfect, they can be hard on themselves if they fall even a smidge short. Keeping a steady routine, and gently reminding them that they're doing a great job (and that you love them no matter what), can help keep your little Virgo from becoming overly stressed under their own self-imposed pressure to keep everything just-so.
- Libra (Sept. 24-Oct. 23)
Most parents hear "It's not fair!" from their offspring, but parents of Libra kids might hear it just a little more often - and in this case, the kids are probably right. Libras, whose symbol is the Scales, are inborn seekers of balance and harmony. This makes them natural peacemakers, fantastic at mediating and helping people work together in compromise.
Unfortunately, if you lay down a parental rule they feel is unfair, you may find yourself in an argument; but the good news is, these pint-sized arbitrators can be convinced by a solid explanation. They have a deep appreciation for music and beauty and thrive in a peaceful household – negativity is toxic to a little Libra. Crank up some tunes, dance in your kitchen, and watch your Libra kid's joy bubble over.
- Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)
You'll learn early to trust your Scorpio scamp's natural intuition, because as the most psychically sensitive sign in the zodiac, Scorpio kids possess a keen ability to "read" people and situations. You won't always know what they're thinking or feeling, because they're also among the most private of signs - great secret-keepers, which can be both good when someone is confiding in them and terrible when they're trying to hide something.
Your little Scorpion is also equipped with quite the proverbial stinger, and they are champion grudge-holders when they feel they've been wronged. But Scorpio kids also love deeply and benefit greatly from displays of affection. They are bold and unafraid, because they trust their own sharp instincts. And they're just as intelligent as they are intuitive, so the Scorpio child is no fool; they don't enjoy being talked down to.
- Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21)
The Sagittarius child has a warm, sunny personality: the smiley face emoji of the zodiac! These happy-go-lucky kids are always the life of the party, because they carry the "party" inside them wherever they go with their natural exuberance. They're endlessly optimistic, which is a wonderful quality - until it involves risk-taking.
Sagittarius children are so sure things will turn out positively that they sometimes fail to even consider the possible negative consequences. But it takes a lot to put a damper on that bright spirit, so they bounce back remarkably well when things do go awry. Little Sagittarians are very independent, and, like their sign, the Archer, are straight shooters: they'll tell you exactly what they're thinking, and always the truth, even if it's painful. These are the kids who will cheerfully tell Aunt Martha that her potato salad isn't as good as Mom's.
Raising children is never a simple task, but the better we understand our kids, the more effective parents we are. We may never have a definitive and specific how-to manual (darn it), but if their star signs can provide even the tiniest glimpse of insight, parenting them accordingly is definitely worth a try.
The 10 Best Foods to Eat While Breastfeeding
When you have a new baby, remembering to take care of yourself can be tough. But if you're nursing, it's especially important to get the extra nutrients you need for both you and your little one (breastfeeding burns an average of 500 calories per day!). "When we're breastfeeding, our bodies take fat, carbohydrates, immune cells, and thousands of other components from our blood to create breast milk," Helen Anderson, RN, MSN, lactation expert for Fairhaven Health and creator of the Milkies Milk Saver, told POPSUGAR. "If your body has to choose between taking nutrients to make milk for your baby or leave them for your body, baby will win every time."
To make those calories count, try working these top 10 breastfeeding "superfoods" into your daily meal plan, while also avoiding the worst foods to eat when nursing.
1. Oatmeal
Inexpensive and easy to dress up, old-fashioned oats top the list. "Oats - packed with whole grain fiber and protein - keep you feeling full for a long time," Anderson explained. "They also digest slowly and keep your blood sugar stable, which could have a big influence on your milk supply."
2. Eggs
Just another great reason to make an omelet for breakfast! "Eggs are a complete protein (aka filled with all the amino acids you and your baby need), and can increase your daily intake of choline, an essential nutrient that helps your health as well as the baby's development," said Elizabeth Shaw, MS, RDN, CLT, and author of Fertility Foods. Choline has also been shown to specifically improve brain development and health.
3. Avocado
A heart-healthy fat - with 75 percent coming from the unsaturated kind - avocado is a naturally awesome food to eat when breastfeeding. "It's a nutrient-rich choice that contains fiber, folate, and protein," said Shaw. "Avocados act as a 'nutrient booster' by helping increase the absorption of fat-soluble nutrients like vitamins A, D, K, and E." Healthy fats can also improve your baby's brain health, so you can have as much avocado toast as you want.
4. Yogurt
A bowl of Greek yogurt is perfect for breakfast or a snack. "Filled with probiotics (aka gut-friendly bacteria that helps strengthen yours and baby's immunity), protein, calcium, and vitamin B-12, it will introduce better bacteria to support good health and digestion," said Shaw.
5. Beans and Legumes
Beans might make you gassy, but they're good for you and your baby. "Fiber, protein, iron, folate, zinc, and calcium are all abundant in the legume family! Adding these to your diet will not only help increase your plant-based proteins, but also help keep you regular, too," Shaw continued. "The iron helps your body deliver oxygen to your cells to keep your energy high and reduce your risk of anemia, which can sap your energy. Legumes have often been used in recipes to aid in lactation in eastern countries for many years," Anderson adds. "Fenugreek is another legume that has a powerful effect on milk supply, and it's available in capsule form from several suppliers."
6. Milk
"Milk contains essential vitamins and minerals like calcium, vitamin D, potassium, and vitamin A that are great for not only your health, but the health of your baby, too," said Shaw.
7. Fruits and Veggies
Seriously, eat the rainbow when you're breastfeeding. "Just make sure to properly wash and rinse all produce to prevent food-borne infection from harming your baby," explained Shaw. "[Carrots] especially are filled with beta-carotene. This crucial nutrient is converted to vitamin A in the body and important for vision and eye health, immunity, and skin elasticity. It easily passes through your breast milk to your baby and gives them all these wonderful benefits."
8. Salmon
While you probably avoided fish during pregnancy, you can reintroduce it to your meal plan while nursing! "These fatty acids convert to DHA in your baby's body," said Shaw. "DHA helps build strong cell walls and creates a protective coating on nerves in the eyes and brain. Eating salmon or tuna at least twice a week will provide the beneficial effects of omega-3."
9. Brown Rice
Anderson said that in addition to being rich in fiber and stabilizing blood sugar, brown rice can also increase serotonin levels - the feel-good chemical that helps us manage stress. Plus, serotonin has also been shown to increase prolactin levels, a key hormone in milk production.
10. Nuts
Packed with good fats, nuts are another food that can help your milk supply. "Nuts contain tryptophan, which converts to serotonin, a natural mood stabilizer that helps you manage stress, sleep better (when you can!), and boost prolactin," said Anderson. "Those good fats transfer through your milk to your baby, which means more nutrition with each swallow."
lundi 11 juin 2018
13 Reasons Why's Timothy Granaderos on THAT Scene: "It Shouldn't Be an Easy Thing to Watch"
Image Source: Shanna Fisher
At the moment, Timothy Granaderos just might be the most hated person on TV. The talented 31-year-old actor, who's been in everything from Rosewood to Runaways, currently stars as Montgomery "Monty" de la Cruz on Netflix's monster hit 13 Reasons Why, where he's carved out a niche for himself as the drama's latest villain. From the perspective of someone who hasn't yet seen it, the series might present as a stereotypical teen melodrama. But after two seasons full of controversial scenes, the show has proved that it's unafraid of taking risks, sometimes to its detriment.
The latest controversy arose after fans of the show made it to season two's last episode, which features a stomach-turning scene in which popular high school jock Monty brutally sexually assaults another male character on the show. Had 13 Reasons Why gone too far, or was it merely shining a necessary light on a topic no other TV series has been brave enough to tackle in such a graphic way? With viewers still debating the contentious moment online and the recent announcement that season three is officially on the way, we hopped on the phone with Granaderos to pick his brain about Monty, #MeToo, and who he hopes future episodes of the series will focus on. (Spoiler alert: his answer might surprise you.)
POPSUGAR: Just like season one, 13 Reasons Why's second season has earned a pretty heated response from fans.
Timothy Granaderos: [Laughs] Yeah, I think I maybe heard something about that.
PS: Was that something that you and your costars were more prepared for this time around?
TG: Yeah, absolutely. Our fans are very passionate, and we knew our story could raise some controversy, but we were better equipped to deal with it. At the end of the day, they're just passionate, and we knew it was coming from a place of love with the show and the characters and story. We were definitely aware.
PS: Monty comes to the forefront of this season in a pretty dramatic way. Can you walk me through your initial reaction to finding out where his story was going in those later episodes?
TG: I guess it was a bit of a shock, but also very . . . this is going to sound weird, but it was exciting to take on such a pivotal role. I mean, [Brian] Yorkey, the showrunner, had approached me a couple episodes out and asked if I was comfortable doing it, and initially it's just shock. And then it's followed by, "OK, how can I ground this and make it real and give this an honest story?" So yeah, it was shocking, but in a good way.
PS: Speaking of Brian Yorkey, he recently commented on the controversy that has exploded online about Monty and Tyler's bathroom scene, saying that putting these kinds of sexual assaults on TV is "better than silence." Do you agree?
TG: It's sad because these scenarios take place more than we realize. It's hard to watch because it's a difficult thing to experience; it shouldn't be an easy thing to watch. More than anything, it's important that we get the conversation started. We need to recognize that these type of situations do take place, and a lot of the time people feel like they don't have a voice; they feel ashamed and like they can't talk to anyone about it. So if someone watching can take something from it or feel like there's a platform for them to speak on it, that's what we want to do.
PS: The bathroom scene is, without a doubt, one of the toughest things I've ever watched, so I can only imagine how difficult it must have been to physically act in it. How, as an actor, do you prepare for something like that? Do you have someone on set, a professional, who you can speak with if you feel like you need to?
TG: Yeah, they brought in professionals, and we had safety meetings before with producers and Yorkey to discuss how it was going to go. They had storyboards to make sure we understood what was going to happen. They let us ask a lot of questions. We sat down, and any questions we had, whether it was blocking or motivation or . . . we just went into the scene feeling very comfortable and prepared. As an actor going into that scene, you just do your work. You do a lot of preparation and research and make all these choices, and then on the day of filming, you just let it go and go into the scene knowing everyone's got your back.
PS: What I find interesting in general about this season is that nothing is ever as it seems, and no one is who you think they are. For instance, the Zach-centric episode, where we find out all this stuff happened that we didn't even realize in season one. The same thing happened with Monty, where now we know he has an alcoholic father and is a victim of abuse himself. Do you feel like, by the end of the season, we're supposed to view him as a sympathetic character in any way?
TG: I think that it's easy for a viewer to look at someone and judge them immediately based on their actions or attitude without taking into account what they're going through, what their home life is. Monty comes from a broken home with an alcoholic father. This happens way more often than we're aware of. I don't think that the show forces you to sympathize with him, but to maybe consider the idea that there's more going on with his character, more that you don't understand or see.
PS: So, if season three does end up happening, do you think we'd ever see Monty being redeemed in a way that doesn't happen in Bryce's story?
TG: Well, we don't know anything about a third season. But in the event of it happening, I would love to see us explore a little more of Monty's home life and dive in to why he acts the way he does so we can answer some questions and see where he's coming from, and in a bigger picture, try to help that character. I know that he's the aggressor and the bully, but bullies need help too. You know, they're victims of a different type of mental health issue.
Image Source: Shanna Fisher
PS: After the season came out, did some fans have trouble separating you from Monty? And if so, did you get any advice from fellow 13 Reasons Why villain Justin Prentice?
TG: [Laughs] I was ready for it, to be honest. A handful of actors got backlash for their characters in season one. Steven [Silver], Michele [Selene Ang], Justin . . . so I was totally prepared for the - excuse me - sh*tstorm that was to come. And you know, Justin reached out, like, "Hey, how you doing, man? Is everything OK?" [Laughs] The fans are just passionate about the characters, but I think they do realize that Timothy is not Monty. Justin even started a hashtag, #TimIsNotMonty, so my team's looking out for me, my fellow actors and everyone. People feel passionate, and they should, so I'm glad that they're reacting the way they are. Hopefully they can all remember that I'm just an actor.
PS: It's hard not to notice the connections between the current conversation in Hollywood about the #MeToo movement and 13 Reasons Why's frank approach to sexual assault. Was that something you ever explicitly discussed on set?
TG: Coincidentally, the #MeToo movement unfolded while we were shooting. It was just a weird case of life imitating art. It was weird to watch that unfold as we were telling that story, and it's something that needed to be talked about. It's just a huge movement that's sad that it's taken this long to get to. This show - people watch a TV show, and they think you're just doing it for the reaction, for the drama or whatever. But in the real world, that stuff really takes place on a daily basis. So I'm glad we can talk about it. And maybe help mold and change some people's viewpoints.
PS: Because season two wraps up Hannah's story, which character, other than your own, would you love to see season three really dig into or focus on?
TG: I'd really love for season three to explore Chloe's story. Her character is someone that you scream at the TV at, because you want her to do the so-called "right thing," but you realize that in her own experience, it's not always the easiest thing to do. So, I'd like to see what motivates her to make the choices she does.
PS: With bombshells like Chloe's pregnancy and all the other serious themes that get explored, the series is obviously pretty heavy - how do you and the cast blow off steam when you're not on set?
TG: We goof off a lot. We're just a bunch of ding-dongs. [Laughs] Just hanging out, going to movies, playing board games, going to dinner, playing video games . . . we just hang out and have a good time, really. This stuff is heavy, but afterwards, it's just like a bunch of friends hanging out at Summer camp.
PHOTOGRAPHY: Shanna Fisher
GROOMING: Michelle Harvey
STYLING: Anne Demay
Here's Why This Is Us Isn't on Netflix
The Pearson family has captured our hearts and given our tear ducts a workout, so it's not surprising that the show is still finding new fans. When it comes time to indulge in a little TV therapy, This Is Us is one of the best places to turn. Unfortunately, Netflix subscribers who are waiting patiently for This Is Us season two to arrive on the website may be out of luck - at least for now. That's because season one of the hit show hasn't appeared on the site yet either.
Don't despair just yet; just because This Is Us isn't on Netflix doesn't mean it's unavailable to stream. In 2017, Hulu and NBC struck a deal to co-own the exclusive streaming rights to the family drama. Per The Hollywood Reporter, the details of the deal reveal that all episodes of the series will be available to Hulu subscribers via the app and website, as well as to cable or satellite customers with valid log-in credentials for the NBC app or website. The show is also available on demand through some providers. Right now, every episode of the first two seasons is available on Hulu - which offers a one-month free trial, by the way - which means you can revisit Kate's wedding, Jack's farewell, or that jaw-dropping pilot twist whenever you want, just not on Netflix.
Despite NBC and Hulu's exclusive deal, it's possible that the show will one day make its way to Netflix. Even though the streaming giant has been focusing on original content the past few years, the bulk of its library is still made up of classic shows like Friends and new favorites like The CW's Riverdale. Netflix even has a shell page set up for the series, which seems promising. When Hulu's deal expires, you can bet Netflix will be tossing its hat into the ring to secure streaming rights for this popular series. Until then, fans can rewatch all of Randall's flawless single-tear scenes on Hulu and the NBC app.
Watch Michelle Obama Embrace Her "Forever First Lady" Nickname
On May 2, Michelle Obama made an appearance at the 2018 College Signing Day at Temple University in front of 8,000 high school students, wooing the crowd by embracing a very popular nickname that was given to her after she and former President Barack Obama left the White House: the "forever first lady."
"I know you have everything it takes to succeed. I know that you are me. And if I can be standing here as your forever first lady," she said before pausing for the crowd to cheer, "then you can do anything you put your mind to."
The College Signing Day event first started under the Obama administration as part of the former first lady's Reach Higher program, which encourages students to get a college education. Watch the moment for yourselves in the video above, and we promise our forever first lady's rousing speech won't let you down.
12 Flaky Texts We All Send to Get Out of Plans
We've all been there before - it's a regular Tuesday night and you just want to watch Netflix and stay in bed, though your friends want you try a new restaurant with them. So you do what everyone else does: come up with an excuse, a white lie, and stay warm in bed, deliriously happy not to be outside.
If you've run out of excuses or just need a handy list for the next time you need to flake, we've come up with the most popular and accepted texts we send. Sure, honesty is the best policy but sometimes you want to keep it to yourself that you're rewatching Gilmore Girls again.
How to Create a Wedding Hashtag No One Else Will Have
Image Source: Brooke Images
There are some brides who ask guests to unplug at their wedding, and some who ask guests to go all out with the photo snapping and sharing. If you're the second type of bride, you're probably already brainstorming your wedding hashtag - you know, the one phrase that guests will use on Instagram and Twitter to round up pictures of your big day. Instead of the more standard conventions you've probably seen all over the place, we bring you 21 unique, creative ideas you haven't thought of. Of course, replace them with your own names, initials, wedding locations, and such to make them special to your big day.
What's the best one you've seen? Let us know!
1. #HappilyEverHarrison
2. #RuizPartyof2
3. #ThatOneMalibuWedding
4. #Newlywedsontheblock
5. #SeanandCassGetHitched
6. #TomKat, #Bennifer, or any other celebrified combo
7. #MrandMrBaker
8. #TimandAnneinWonderland
9. #WeSaidIDoOnJune2
10. #KristenLovesJustin
Image Source: SMS Photography
11. #SmithNoMore*
12. #LauBeachBash
13. #ThisisOurWeddingHashtag
14. #StokedtobeaHorowitz*
15. #TwasaGoodKnight
16. #WeCameWeSawWeWed
17. #SamandNicoleKissandTell
18. #JessandTimTietheKnot
19. #KylieWedsCara
20. #AdventuresofJuanandCelina
21. #TandGForBestWeddingEver
*Maybe better for a bachelor/bachelorette party than a wedding?
10 Immigrant Women Who Changed the Course of US History
As the war on immigration rages all around, taking stock of our history may be our best hope for gaining the perspective necessary to move forward. After all, history is the story of everyday people and movements over time.
Consider America's original inhabitants, who crossed the Bering Strait tens of thousands of years ago, followed by the first wave of European settlers in 1500 and the violent, forced migration of African slaves starting in the 1600s. Later, in the 1890s, a new generation of people entered America, starting with Annie Moore, a young Irish woman who was the first of many immigrants processed at Ellis Island. Immigration is our shared history; moving to new lands that promise greater opportunity is human nature.
Here, we reflect on 10 immigrant women who helped shape America's history and culture. And once you've clicked through, take a moment to consider how different your life might be without Hedy Lamarr's inventions or Dr. Elizabeth Stern's research.
31 NC-17 Movies That Are Basically Porn With a Plot
There should be no shame in your sex-filled movie-loving game. Porn with a plot is a thing - and it's basically a thing called an NC-17 movie. If you like your steamy scenes against the backdrop of a dramatic, interesting, or thrilling story, then these sexy movies are exactly what you need. From foreign films to dark love stories and even straight-up comedies, these movies will fulfill your NC-17 fantasies . . . and maybe spark some new ones too.
18 Sex-Filled Films to Stream on Netflix
For when you want some good, clean onscreen lovin' that's not porn, I've found an array of sexy films available on Netflix. There are foreign flicks, romantic comedies, period pieces, and everything in between (the sheets) - perfect for solo watching or date night. So hop into bed with one of these steamy movies tonight!
Seriously Cute Harry Potter Gear That You Can Rock When It's Hot Outside
Because the Harry Potter series is set in chilly Britain and has many notable moments during the Winter season, most of the Potter-inspired merchandise on the market consists of sweaters, scarves, and long-sleeved garments. But what's a fangirl to do during Spring and Summer, when the weather outside turns warm? If you want to rep your fandom in every season, then you should say "accio!" to these tanks, dresses, and other warm-weather wardrobe finds. (We're sorry in advance for your Gringotts account.)
Geek Fashion You'll Want in Your Closet Immediately
The most incredible geek event we've ever attended? That would be the first-ever geek couture fashion show held in July during San Diego Comic-Con 2014. Fandom fashion retailer Her Universe called upon the galaxy's most stylish designers, both professional and amateur, to present their original, handmade creations on the runway. Consider it a preview of what to expect at this year's festival.
What we saw was not cosplay. Oh no, these gowns could have belonged on the pages of Vogue or at New York Fashion Week. As one of the designers put it: for those who aren't geeks, the clothing would just seem cute and unique, but for those who are geeks and can recognize the reference, the garment has a special twist.
Ultimately, the event was a competition, in which the winner will codesign a fashion collection exclusively for Hot Topic. But in all honesty, the winner was all fangirls, everywhere, who now live in a time where wearing a t-shirt to express fandom isn't the only option. Continue on for a ranking of our favorite geeky gowns from the Her Universe show!
-Additional reporting by Kelly Schwarze
Photos: Kelly Schwarze
The 17 Sexiest, Steamiest Scenes From Fifty Shades of Grey
No matter what you think of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, you can't deny that Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey have some serious chemistry. We can't help but get hot and bothered thinking of all the sexy scenes, especially from the first movie when everything was fresh and new and the sexual tension had us like whoa. Don't remember all tantalizing moments? Let us jog your memory. We have rounded up the best, naughtiest NSFW GIFs from the film so you can relive it it all its raunchy glory. Every kiss, spank, and steamy sex scene is right here in one place. Happy viewing.
25 Great Geek-Approved Desk Items
A boring, predictable desk simply won't do for a savvy geek. These 25 items are guaranteed to make the inner geek in you swoon. We've got just the right items for you, whether you are looking to organize your wires more efficiently, make your space ergonomically friendly, or add a little irreverence to your cubicle.
Which Badass Harry Potter Witch Are You?
We've all got a favorite Harry Potter character (or five), but that doesn't mean that they match our personalities. After all, if every person who adores the Weasley twins shared their affinity for practical jokes, the world would be filled with whoopee cushions and cling-wrapped toilets. But using this addictive personality quiz from Playbuzz, you can find out which witch from the series you're most like. Thanks to the wide variety of badass ladies in J.K. Rowling's magical novels, there's no disappointing result - except Dolores Umbridge, of course! Take the test below to discover your witchy soul mate, then find out which hybrid Hogwarts house you belong in.
15 Romantic TV Shows You Can Stream on Netflix
If you're in the mood for a romance-fueled TV show, Netflix has got you covered. There's nothing better than a little love to keep a series interesting. Whether you want to laugh, cry, or both, we've rounded up the best romantic shows that are streaming right now. Get ready to press play!
- Additional reporting by Stacey Nguyen
11 Sex-Fueled TV Shows You Can Stream on Netflix Right Now
Looking for a little steamy evening entertainment? Netflix has tons of sex-filled TV shows you can stream whenever you want. We've rounded up the hottest shows that are fun to watch whether you're on your own or with a date. Check out these sexy picks!
What It's Like Being Transgender and Undocumented When Your Rights Are at Stake
Ximena Ospina knows all too well what oppression looks and feels like. The 23-year-old transgender activist, who was born in Cali, Colombia, is a current DACA recipient. She lives in NYC, where she's been studying sociology and business at Columbia University since September 2016. It's a major change from where she was last year: homeless, alone, and with little opportunity in the workforce. Having come to the US from her home country as a young child, Ospina has had to fight for her place not only in this country but also within the Latinx community as a transgender, undocumented woman.
Ospina first came to the US in 1999 on a tourist visa with her sister and her father's cousin. The experience was traumatic for the then-5-year-old, whose parents had already immigrated and settled in New Jersey. The family overstayed their visas but struggled financially. A year after making a home in the US, Ospina's parents made a difficult decision: to send Ospina and her sister back to Colombia for a few months while they got their finances in order. They were later able to afford to fly their children back to the States on a tourist visa, which they overstayed. That time around, the US became Ospina's permanent home.
In 2018, Ospina is helping to unite undocumented queer individuals like herself who have trouble finding their tribe. She's a scholar under Point Foundation, which helps rising lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer students achieve their full academic and leadership potential. She's also a regular Section Leader in New York's Pride March and a translator for the New York Immigration Coalition. Ospina, who also goes by "Undocuqueer" on social media, spoke to POPSUGAR about her journey as a transgender woman and undocumented Latinx in a country where her rights are constantly targeted - and her strength and endurance underestimated.
Image Source: Third Blade Photography
POPSUGAR: What were the first years like, living as a child in a new country that you're not from?
Ximena Ospina: It wasn't too difficult because it was the best of an immigration POC enclave, I would say. Most people were either immigrants themselves or children of immigrants. Adjusting wasn't too hard because I was surrounded by Latinxs and people of color. I didn't feel necessarily excluded from the mainstream, only in that I noticed I didn't look like anyone on TV or movies. But we also just watched so much Latinx television that it wasn't even that big of a deal. If anything, I guess my biggest struggle growing up was just my femme-ness and my queerness. Most of the violence I received was about my queerness and not the fact that I wasn't a white American.
PS: When did you come into your identity not just as a Latinx but as a transperson?
XO: I didn't arrive to a conclusion or understand myself as trans until I turned 21. I came out as bisexual in 2010 but didn't come out to my friends as trans until 2015.
PS: Did you always know growing up that you were undocumented?
XO: I knew just because it would always come up in conversation. I didn't feel shame about it. I grew up being fully aware that I was going to be forced into undocumented misery, but that didn't affect me a lot growing up.
PS: Did you experience the effects of being undocumented when you first signed up for DACA or when you were trying to pay for school?
XO: I started to feel the main effect of it probably during driver's ed, which was in high school. It was mandatory, so I knew that even if I did well in the class and if I passed the driving test, there was no point because I still couldn't get a license. But again, there were so many undocumented people in school that it was very normal. It was just stressful. DACA came out after I graduated, so that entire time, I couldn't make any money, and my parents were not interested in giving me allowances or anything. I had to sell garbage bags to groups of teachers and random stuff to members of my school just to pay for prom and the senior retreat.
Image Source: Third Blade Photography
PS: When did you first sign up for DACA?
XO: The day after I graduated high school. But I didn't get my DACA [status] until February 2013. I was happy not to be working under the table [anymore] because before I got my DACA, I was working at a warehouse and working in landscaping.
PS: Were you going to school while working?
XO: No, I wasn't. I didn't go to college right after high school. I was only going to school part-time, paying for two classes at a time in cash because the scholarships weren't [as] plentiful as they are now.
PS: Do you remember specifically what it felt like signing up for DACA? Were you nervous about trusting all your information to the government?
XO: I wasn't scared. I really just had faith in the government and everything that Democrats were saying and Obama was saying. I was just excited to be able to work and have a life - and just being able to get my own car and drive, because my relationship with my parents wasn't good, and I depended on my dad a lot for rides.
PS: What was the process like?
XO: It was a little nerve-racking because I did it all by myself. I didn't want to spend money on lawyers, and lawyers were really predatorial at that time. I was mostly frustrated to have to drop all the money [for the DACA application]. (Editor's note: an initial DACA application costs roughly $465.) That was already very painful to come by, doing all these manual-labor jobs.
PS: What would you say are some misconceptions about DACA recipients?
XO: A misconception is we deserve more sympathy than other immigrants. I feel like we're just lucky to have [immigrated] at a certain age. (Editor's note: DACA recipients must have entered the country before their 16th birthday and been under the age of 31 in June 2012 to qualify.)
"I used to think of myself as a Latinx person who happened to be undocumented but was actually part of the LGBTQ community. As I began my activism, I began to think of myself as belonging to both communities."
PS: Was this during your coming out as a transperson? Did you have to change your name in that paperwork?
XO: I actually decided that all of this - legally changing [my] birth name and gender - is going to have to happen after I've gained status, which is a really depressing thing and certainly causes me daily anxiety and depression. It's hard to live with, but I know I probably won't legally be able to change my name for a while.
PS: How would you describe your activism?
XO: I think my activism is more focused on intercommunity building more than awareness raising. My activism used to be more about awareness raising at the beginning until I realized, again, we're preaching to a choir, really. Because none of this is about awareness or understanding systems. It's really just like a very intentional forced oppression of people.
PS: Would you say there were parallels between finding your queer community and also finding your undocumented community?
XO: I used to think of myself as a Latinx person who happened to be undocumented but was actually part of the LGBTQ community. As I began my activism, I began to think of myself as belonging to both communities. As times progressed, my work got more comprehensive. I realized that it was a waste of my time and energy to fight for both communities as a whole, and [instead I fight] for the people that go through my experiences.
Image Source: Third Blade Photography
PS: Would you say that everything you're describing to me right now is what inspired your activism?
XO: I think my activism comes from my loneliness . . . from the fact that my sister left the house when I was 13 and she's never come back, really. She visits, but she wasn't allowed back into the country [from Canada] for 10 years, so I grew up without her. That upbringing created this sense of loneliness in me, and so as I became an adult and had more control of my life, I sought out these communities because I realized, yes, there is such a thing as oppression and hatred.
PS: You have experienced homelessness. One in five transpeople has experienced discrimination when looking for a home, and more than one in 10 has been evicted from their home. What do you think this country can do to lower these numbers?
XO: People who are looking for roommates have to cut the whole gender bullsh*t because a lot of my homelessness was exacerbated by the fact that people were specifically looking for cis [roommates]. What they really should do is look for roommates who won't kill them and who need the housing they're offering.
PS: Have you met a lot of LGBTQ+ people through DACA?
XO: I feel like DACA was rather inconsequential to my life in terms of how I socialize, really, or who I socialize with, until I started activism. I felt it was really important to have undocumented folks around me. It's definitely been a lot of work because undocumented queer folks . . . it's so hard for us to have spaces to come together. I'm just glad that my work basically has been to put me in touch with people like me.
PS: Is there something from the undocumented queer experience that you would want people to know about?
XO: I want people to begin to realize that the curves of political agency, or at least navigating the political climate of these days, that [undocumented queer people] are actually masters at it. I feel we hold the freaking keys to survival because we already know what it's like to fight for LGBTQ rights. And we already know how to live under that kind of pressure and that kind of hatred and that kind of demand to constantly validate yourself. I think what's more frustrating is that even the cisgender heterosexuals of the immigrant rights movement totally disregard just how much experience we have with oppression.
PS: Can you tell me how you felt the moment Trump set his sights on DACA?
XO: I wasn't surprised. I was just like, "OK, how am I going to survive now? And how am I going to make sure I show up for people who are going to be suffering?" The day he rescinded DACA, I was actually outside Trump Tower during the press statement. I was by Trump Tower protesting, yelling, the whole shebang. Because at that point I knew there was nothing else I could do except yell and let out my anger.
PS: Do you feel the pressure to have a "Plan B" if they take away DACA?
XO: I have "Plan B through Z." I don't think any undocumented person at this point doesn't have a "Plan B" . . . it's always been trying to find ways that I can apply for some sort of protection because I'm trans. My deportation is a little like a death sentence because transwomen of color in Latin America don't live past their mid-30s. They're murdered or they kill themselves from abuse. (Editor's note: according to a report by Transgender Europe, 82 percent of reported trans murders between October 2016 and September 2017 were in Central and South America.)
I'm lucky enough that I have gathered resources for myself that might possibly ensure that I can live a freelance livelihood doing what I like, but I know that's a very privileged position, and I know that a lot of undocumented queers don't have the opportunity or the option to rely on their status to survive.
30 Ways to Show Your Love (That Don't Cost a Thing)
When a relationship is shiny and new, it's easy to be intentional because you want to make sure they know you care and that you're invested. You want to show you're interested in them and the things that matter to them. Over time, though, it can be easy to just assume they know you love them and stop showing your love in clear ways.
Here are 30 ways to show your love that don't cost a thing! Reignite the flame and make it clear how much they mean to you.
11 Flicks With High School Romances to Stream Stat
We can't help but reminisce about notes passed between friends, the days of lockers and recess, and, of course, our teenage crushes. If you're feeling nostalgic about bleacher make-out sessions and prom-date jitters, then check out these movies streaming on Netflix. We promise they're chock-full of all the cliquey drama, backstabbing friends, and awkward first-date moments that made high school equal parts exhilarating and nightmarish!
Here's How You Can Set Your Fitness Tracker For More Accurate Results
Ever glanced at your fitness tracker while weightlifting and wondered why it was completely off? Your device may be fantastic for tracking heart rate and cardio, but a common weakness found across wearables is the ability to detect strength-training exercises. That's because Fitbit's PurePulse technology and Apple's similar heart sensor technology use LED lights to detect the amount of blood flow in your wrist. This provides real-time data on your heart rate and calories burned, but they're much more suited for tracking rhythmic movements like dance cardio or running. The good news is that there are tips and tricks to better optimize your device's settings to make sure your workouts are accounted for.
Fitbit Tips
- Customize your exercise shortcuts on the Fitbit app to include "Weights" as one of the Exercise options on your Fitbit Blaze, Fitbit Charge 2, Fitbit Ionic, or Fitbit Versa. According to Fitbit, this will provide you with more precise heart rate tracking, capturing it every one second versus every five seconds.
- You can also manually log the duration of your strength-training workout directly in the app.
- Fitbit also offers a built-in interval timer that you can customize to fit your workout. It vibrates and lights up to indicate when it's time to move or rest.
Apple Watch Tips
- Select the "Other" workout option on your Apple Watch and label it as "Strength Training" at the end of your workout. It will provide you with time, heart rate, and calories for that specific session.
- When you're holding a plank, for instance, the "Other" workout will still credit you the calorie equivalent of a brisk walk, while also counting toward your all-day Activity.
If you're in a mixed-format class like Barry's Bootcamp, where you switch from the treadmill to floor, you can also manually switch between exercise modes. It may not give you a comprehensive look at your entire workout, but you can at least get more accurate snapshots of individual exercises for measuring purposes.
Despite the challenges that smart watches and fitness trackers have, San Francisco-based trainer Austin Lopez encourages all of his clients, especially his remote ones, to wear a Fitbit. At the end of each week, he has everyone send in their weekly reports for accountability and progress.
"In terms of goals, it comes down to consistency," Lopez told POPSUGAR. "The wearables help maintain consistency by notifying you of daily activity levels being reached, workout goal progress, and other healthy habits. As a trainer, it is helpful because I don't have to send hundreds of reminders a day, rather, I check in with my clients' overall lifestyle in a week's time."
When using his personal Fitbit during workouts, Austin shoots for a certain number of burned calories per session. Regardless of whether or not that number is accurate, setting a benchmark can help him gauge how hard he worked. You can do the same by giving your next workout everything you've got to see the maximum amount of calories you can burn on your tracker. Then, compare your future workouts to that data for a better look at your progress.
Overall, get familiar with your device and figure out all the ways you can tailor it to you. Its default settings may be great to start off with, but you can manipulate your Apple Watch or Fitbit past the main screen to truly use it to its fullest potential. Keep in mind that although they may not be the most accurate at all times, they're fantastic for tracking your personal activity and progress, and there's value in that alone.
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