lundi 25 septembre 2017
This Mom's Powerful Side-by-Side Photo Shows How "Invisible" Depression Really Is
In the parenting world, there are always opportunities to cast judgment on others . . . She sent her kid to school in that? Ugh, they canceled on me again? My kid would be grounded if he ever talked to me like that.
Whitney Fleming took to her Facebook page Playdates on Fridays, to give her fellow parents an important reminder: be kind to others because you never really know what they're going through.
A mother of three girls, she explained how a text from one of her friends inspired her to share her story:
"'I wish I would have known she was depressed. I mean, she didn't look like it.' These are the words a friend texted me last night after hearing that a mutual acquaintance was hospitalized for severe depression."
Those words seemed all too familiar to Fleming, who has struggled with depression in the past.
Here are two pictures of me from the last two years. One of them is when I was in the middle of what a doctor called a "depressive episode" after a freak illness altered me chemically and emotionally, and the other when I was considered "cured."
Can you tell the difference? There's a reason we say be kind to everyone you meet because you don't know what battles they're fighting. There's a reason we say appearances are deceiving. There's a reason we call them "invisible illnesses."
Fleming also explained how depression and mental illness often come with a heavy dose of shame for people, so those who are battling it aren't usually chomping at the bit to discuss it. "Many people who face depression are also filled with shame," she said. "They do not share their feelings with anyone. They do not want to appear ungrateful for the life they lead or judged for their apathy. They do not know how to justify a sadness they themselves cannot explain."
So how exactly do you help parents out who are struggling with depression? Simply by being nice.
"Be kind to the mom who seems off or keeps canceling," wrote Fleming. "Don't judge the woman who may dress differently or isn't as friendly as you think she should be. Offer help to the parent who seems overwhelmed. Check in with friends, even when you feel like you can't fit one more thing into your busy day."
So if you have the chance to flash another parent a smile at school drop-off, take it. You never know who needs it.
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